My heart is in a knot.

It has been for a few weeks.

Having a child graduate is very bitter/sweet.

He’s ready.

I’m not.

It is a glorious culmination celebration of so many years of wonder and work and worry and whining 🙂  And my heart is so full yet so empty.

Tonight is his seminary graduation.

So I just had to share this clip that I happened to find of my own when I was searching old stuff for Max’s senior slide show.

Let’s take a look at who I shake hands with at the end:

Yep, that’s President Hinkley and Elder Nelson.  I had totally forgotten about that, but President Hinkley’s grandson and Elder Nelson’s son were my good friends and graduated with me.

And that feels like it was YESTERDAY!

Onward (I guess) to my favorite boy’s graduation tonight!  Then school graduation tomorrow.

Not ready but I better buckle my bootstraps cause it’s coming whether I like it or not!

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13 Comments

  1. Hah! Love seeing this after ShoulderGate 2015 regarding the Prom Dress. I guess shoulders were just fine in 1990. When did they get so controversial in LDS land? You look fresh and happy and lovely just like your daughters.

  2. Oh my goodness! I have about 3 weeks before I have to face all this. We don't do graduations until mid-June here in the Northwest. My heart is not ready– even though I know my daughter is. Congratulations to Max–and to you and Dave for raising such a fine young man.
    What a wonderful experience for you to have had Pres. Hinckley and Elder Nelson at your seminary graduation. If I'm ever having a down day- I YouTube something from Pres. Hinckley. Just hearing his voice makes me feel hopeful and happy. I just love him! Lisa

  3. You have not aged….and ShoulderGate made me laugh…so true!! Fun times ahead. I've been clinging to your sisters quote, "Enjoy it…because its happening" Love that! Not loving change, so much!

  4. Shawni, I just graduated my 4th son and is is just as hard as it was with my oldest. I waited so long to be a mom and it has flown by in a flash. I still have 2 more boys to go, but that time will be gone so fast as well. I can tell you this, as hard as it is now, the JOY that comes from new thingslike missions, marriages and grandbabies eases some of the challenge and longing for days gone by so fast. Good Luck and know that there are many of us who truly understand your aching momma heart. Hang on!!! It Will be alright!

  5. Shawni, I just graduated my 4th son and is is just as hard as it was with my oldest. I waited so long to be a mom and it has flown by in a flash. I still have 2 more boys to go, but that time will be gone so fast as well. I can tell you this, as hard as it is now, the JOY that comes from new thingslike missions, marriages and grandbabies eases some of the challenge and longing for days gone by so fast. Good Luck and know that there are many of us who truly understand your aching momma heart. Hang on!!! It Will be alright!

  6. What a video, my goodness! How in the heck do you keep all of that old stuff categorized easy to find? Like all your growing up years videos and pictures, that's the hard stuff!

    An idea I heard that I thought you'd love. I knew a family that had a bunch of boys. They knew all the boys would be going on missions, but who knows maybe your girls will be too and everyone will still end up leaving the house most likely after graduation anyways so this will probably work for ya! What they did was the 1 year leading up to the boy departing on his mission he would pick a song and that was HIS song they sang for FHE. They sang the same song for FHE for one whole year leading up to him going on a mission (or leaving for college!) Once he was gone they wouldn't sing it anymore for FHE. But then every time they heard that song over the years the whole family would think of that son/brother and many would end up in tears because it was HIS song and they missed him yet it was his song and it reminded them how much they loved him. Also, since they sang it a whole year the family knew all the verses by heart and could sing it loud and proud. I think it's a cute tradition I could see you and your family running with.

    Yay for Max graduating but oh man how I can understand your heartache!

    Your blog is one of the most I look forward to reading each time you update, thank you for being so great and inspiring me to be better!

  7. How do they call you in the video?
    Honestly, I think you look a bit different which I DO NOT mean as an insult. You actually look a lot like Grace, more than you do now.

    Congratulations to Max!

  8. Wow! I rewatched it and she does look so much like Grace. So wonderful that you have access to such videos. I don't have much documentation of my younger years. It's making me think of my own graduation!

  9. My heart goes out to you. It's a journey that takes from lows to highs and sometimes it's the highs that are so hard. I'll be think about you!

  10. LUCKY! Look at Prophet Hinkley! Beautiful old man! <3 Good luck today during Max's graduation. I hope you have enough tissues to get you through it!

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