Oh you can’t see the fear in her eyes in that picture, but boy, she was nervous and was putting on a good face (and my heart was swelling up with love at that). Elle was going strong with the pepping up too…I had to screenshot this cute “conversation” they were having:
Still no roommate when we had to head to the orientation, but I put on a happy face and tried not to let on how nervous I was for her at the orientation. Nervous because Max went to camp once and never got a roommate and I was so sad that he was all alone and he ended up loving it anyway. Isn’t it so funny how we as mothers sometimes get even more nervous than our kids are? And we try to zip our lips closed because maybe they’re not even nervous but if we say something they may well realize that actually, come to think of it, they are nervous after all. Which may induce a bout of bursting out in tears. Or is that just me?
So I stood there and acted like my heart was just as good as ever as all the coaches introduced themselves (some from Max’s team which was fun):
That’s not true. But that girl’s timber did get stronger that week. Because she took on that new experience and learned from it. And her mom didn’t come in to save the day. She managed just perfectly without a roommate. She felt the joy of coming out of her comfort zone (really she did!) and pushed herself in a beautiful way. She met so many great kids and had the best week.
And totally lived to tell us about it when she arrived triumphantly with Dave to the lake, glowing with confidence that yes, she can do stuff like that.
This is a small and mild example of the many “windy” moments my kids have faced lately. Some I can talk about here, some I can’t. But even through the stress and worry, I do know that there is beautiful growth to be gained in all those “refiner’s fires.” So why is it so hard not to try to “save” them from all the tough stuff?
What about your kids? Are you a “lawnmower parent” or do you get out of the way and let that wind mold and shape them into their best selves? I think it’s good to ask ourselves that every now and again.
There’s a book I keep hearing about that I just ordered called The Coddling of the American Mind that I just ordered (HERE).
Can’t wait to read it, I’ll have to come back and report.