2026 Snapshot: Life as Empty Nesters

I usually do a “snapshot” of how life is right at that moment at the beginning of each new year. And this year feels especially significant because it’s our first season as empty nesters.

Oh, I’m a record-keeper, that’s for sure. And this blog holds so many precious memories for our family.

But I love having these “snapshots” to remember what life was like during that very snippet of time: the beginning of a new year.

And even though April is not so “beginning-of-the-year,” this year is certainly no exception for wanting to remember this snippet of time.

It’s a year so different from all my other snapshots — those years when we had kids home and were immersed in the hubbub of movement from their activities. The babies, the teenagers, the gradual letting-go-of adult children. All the homework, the high school dances, the wrestling with God to figure things out. The continual plunking away at the puzzle of raising a child with special needs. Oh man, life is full! Full of joy and problems and dark turns right alongside beautiful vistas.

A New Season of Empty-Nesting

This year – 2026 – David and I find ourselves for the first time as empty-nesters.

Sometimes we think it’s too good to be true, this empty nesting business. For the first time in twenty-eight years of raising children it feels like we have so much more freedom. After all those years we’re not a slave to the school schedule and we can figure out our own. We’ve had a chance to travel and dive into work and “date” each other much more. All this seems so victorious to me in so many ways. Yet when I drive by any of the schools our children attended (which is often), I get this lump in my throat. I think about all the drop-offs and “I love yous,” the orchestra concerts and talent shows. I think about the football games and the high school dances that are now just echoes of a rich and full time gone by. And I wonder at how quickly all those grand times have skipped away.

It is interesting how this saying rings even more true in my heart these days:

“Making the decision to have a child – it is momentous.  It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body.”

–Elizabeth Stone

Those pieces of my heart, my children, are still walking around outside of my body, doing good and growing and learning in pretty awesome ways.

Our Children All Living Away

As of the year 2026, our kids are all living far away from us.

This is a our own family miracle. So it’s hard not to celebrate empty nesting because of that miracle.

For years we didn’t know quite how to set our hearts up for this empty nest gig. Would it really happen? Would Lucy be able to leave the nest as she so desperately wanted? And if she did, would she be able to succeed in this dream of hers?

But she is doing it! Yes, she made sure we did college tours, took part in an excellent college prep program for the blind, successfully completed the USU orientation program, and went ahead and started college at Utah State University.

Thereby granting us the title of “empty nesters,” which we cherish. Not only because we got to let that school schedule go, but because she, and the rest of our children, are stretching their wings of progression, each in their own way.

A Snapshot of our Adult Kids

Thankfully we get to visit those kids of ours…both in person and through technology.

Thank heaven’s for technology.

And thank Heavens we get to gather as much as we do.

We had some good times gathering up there in Utah for this last ski season.

Utah Kids

We have five kids in Utah plus our two grand babies. I LOVE that these kids are in pretty close proximity together. They get together pretty often up there, and that is so fun to see.

All except for Lucy who they don’t see too much. Logan is a tricky place for Lucy to maneuver from! But you know what? She does it when she can. We’ve figured out a bus system that can sometimes get her to point A to B, with the help of family and friends.

I LOVE this pic of all four of these sisters together when Elle happened to be in town as well.

Why is it so fun to see your adult children together??

I love that these college kids have the BEST group of cousins up there in Utah too.

They get together for Survivor Nights (a Pothier tradition that started when they were all young).

I love that they often get together for group dates with their boyfriends/girlfriends.

Palo Alto Kids

There’s all that Utah business, and then there’s Elle and Carson. Who are snuggly planted in Palo Alto, California. Right outside San Francisco.

Thankfully even though they’re removed from everyone else they get lots of visitors. Lucy and I got to visit Palo Alto when they first moved there. Grace and Claire visited that beloved big sister and her husband when Claire returned home from her mission. And Max and Abby will be visiting them this weekend for Easter. Woohoo!

Let’s do a small little update on each kid.

Individual Adult Kids Snapshots

Max, Abby, Murphy and Ada

Oh these guys! They are living the young family life in Provo and how we love them.

Max is still working for a computer programming company and Abby is kept as busy as can be with these two spunky girls of theirs:

Sometimes when they send videos and pictures on our group family text we cannot handle ourselves how much we love them.

If you follow me on Instagram then you probably saw this video of Murphy singing, and it can give you a tiny taste into the personality of that girl of ours.

How fun is it to have your kids become parents??

Ada just turned one.

She’s in the business of growing her own set of teeth.

And Murphy is almost three (next month).

Once again, can hardly handle how much we love these girls. And their parents.

Elle & Carson

Elle and Carson are loving their little pocket of Palo Alto, California right next to Stanford. Carson is gearing up for his last year of residency there, and who knows where their path will lead them from there.

Elle is working for a graphic design company and also does freelance work. I know I’m biased but I think she’s incredibly talented and she keeps herself very busy. I love seeing the creations she comes up with.

They, being beach-lovers at heart, are always finding a way to get to the beach–Half Moon Bay or Santa Cruz for surfing.

They are surrounded by some pretty incredible friends who take the best care of them, and I’m sure the feeling is mutual. It was so fun to meet some of them during our recent visit to Palo Alto.

They are also the best aunt and uncle you could ask for:

Grace

Grace graduated from UVU right before Christmas. She is yet our FIFTH child (counting the in-laws of course) who won’t be able to “walk” for graduation, gosh darn it! The others all graduated during Covid, luckily we got to go to Carson’s medical school graduation.

Grace works at an ultrasound place where she gets to work with moms-to-be. It’s extra exciting when one of those emergent mothers happens to be her cousin.

So excited for you, Ana!!

She loves what she does and is currently trying to figure out how to take it up a notch.

She has the best roommates and a very nice boyfriend who we love.

And always has a ready sidekick any time she can get her hands on those babies.

Claire

Claire has been home for her mission for just over a year, and we got to go visit that mission of hers in January.

It was so incredible to watch her light shine over there in that country with these people who are now her family. Australia was made sacred to us all as we visited the places and people she served.

Claire also has a nice boyfriend we love:

And a group of such amazing girls she met during summer school before playing volleyball at UVU. I talked about how nine of the eleven of them ended up going out all over the world to serve missions. And now they’re all back. I also talked about a special night when I gathered them all to share mission stories after Claire came home.

And now FIVE are getting married coming up speedy-quick.

During her mission, Claire transferred from UVU to BYU and is actually loving her extremely difficult classes. She’s applying for the business program coming up and is going to do an internship in NYC this summer. Exciting things ahead!

Lucy

I already talked about Lucy and linked to all the posts about her milestones lately. But I picture this picture in my mind all the time:

A girl going confidently in the direction of her dreams.

There have been lots of ups and downs along this bumpy college road. So much to learn and so much to take in. For her as well as for us. But that girl is surrounded by an army of goodness. There was a time when we were specifically worried about how lonely she is. We asked the whole extended family to pray and fast for her. And they showed up in more ways than that.

So grateful for the angels that surround that girl of ours. And so grateful for technology.

Grateful for her usually happy calls as she walks to class. Her FaceTime calls when she needs help with which buttons to push on the washing machine. And her connection to her siblings which is golden.

We haven’t visited much…we wait for the invitation because she is SO independent. She did invite me up to help her get situated a few months ago. That visit to my college girl was pretty precious to me.

Lucy is still a baking wonder…maybe she’ll have to pick up her cookie business this summer.

Life as Empty Nesters (Me & Dave)

Ok, and finally on to me and David…the ones left at home.

There is so much time filled up with those adult children of ours…and our grandbabies.

But there’s also time for just the two of us, and I do love that.

When we are home, we sure love it here. When we get breaks from work we do things like cleaning out cabinets and sunset bike rides.

We are so lucky to have good friends around. We get together for game nights sometimes:

And for hiking or walking:

Impromptu dinners:

And for travel too.

Dave recently got released from his calling serving in the bishopric of our church congregation. It is so nice to have him and be at church together.

We have a long-standing morning date to work out together at F-45 which we both love.

We both work from home, and sometimes it’s hard to find a balance with that. I swear I could work on this blog and all my “things” I want to do every hour of the day.

I get to do the WeBelieve devotionals I think about quarterly:

Dave serves on the board of the BBS family association and has his fingers in so many different work things, in China as well as here.

I am always working on some job or another working to gather the women in our church congregation for my church calling.

I could go on and on here, but I’ll save you from that and just leave you with a few more photos of all the good parts.

(We’ll leave the dark and hard parts out for now, but believe me, they’re there.)

The Missing is Still There

I do get a little melancholy riding the tandem bike around the neighborhood with no Lucy on the back…

And I do so miss her and everyone else. But so grateful I get to do life with this guy. And keep choosing him over and over again as empty nesters.

There you go, our empty nest life update. It continues to be a strange transition as we are always on the journey to let kids go. But there’s so much good to be found in the process as we continue to progress in our own ways.