Little did we know when we spent our first summer in China all those years ago that we would be back. We ended up getting to live in China as a family for a full semester when Max was a senior and Elle was a junior. Still all these years later, it’s one of the favorite memories we have as a family.
Also, little did we know when we were exploring Hong Kong en route back home nearly twenty years ago that this little two-year-old would be back:
Can you see that tiny little girl at the foot of that beautiful statue?
Yep, she had the opportunity to go back.
This time as an HXP leader.
HXP stands for Humanitarian Experience and it’s an organization with a goal to change lives through sustainable service.
It has taken countless teenagers all over the world to forget themselves, their phones, their social media, their every-day worries, and to focus themselves on someone else.
Grace got to go when she was a teenager and had a pretty incredible experience.
How it Happened that Claire Became and HXP Leader
Claire heard about the application deadline coming to apply to be an HXP counselor near the end of her mission. She had never really thought about it before, and was still in full-on mission mode, but figured it was worth a try. It would be a mighty experience and it may help her adjust to “real life” after a mission.
She was able to turn in her application, and got permission to have a few interviews before she came home. The timing of these were in the wee hours of the morning in Australia, but she made it work. There were lots of things to do she worked on on P-Days, (had to make a video, etc.) but she completed it then got back to mission work. This girl wanted to work so hard in Australia until the very last minute of her time there.
Low and behold, she got an email that announced she had made it through all the cuts and was offered this summer position.
They don’t tell you where you will go until you’re all locked in, so she had a big decision to make. She’d miss some family things and the decision was a tricky one. I, as her mother, figured it’d be great to NOT have her go. I was a little bit selfishly wanting her to myself. I didn’t say anything…I’ve learned through the years to KMC (keep my mouth closed) with these adult kids. Dave and I knew she’d make the right decision for herself.
And that hard won and much debated-over decision was YES. She was going to take the opportunity to go and lead two different groups of teenagers in a mystery land for five weeks.
I am SO glad I didn’t mess with this, because man alive, this girl made a pretty awesome decision that I could have possibly talked her out of.
A few weeks after she accepted, they had a big reveal where everyone was going to be going.
We had been checking into all the different programs in all the different countries they offer, and figured maybe she’d go to Taiwan. I mean, she does speak Mandarin, after all.
But we were all shocked and so excited when she sent us all a message:
HONG KONG!!!
Wow.
Another big adventure stretched out on the horizon for her!
A Big HXP Training
There was a mandatory training for ALL the hundreds of leaders in late spring. They met up at a place at Bear Lake and were given so much information and trained so thoroughly. I mean, each of these “kids” would be watching over and shepherding so many other kids as their leaders. In foreign lands with foreign currency and with all kinds of varying adventures. Honestly I don’t know how they do it, there are SO many logistics! But I must say, they do a pretty fabulous job.
Claire said the hype of that training was like a mixture of a super spirited high school football game and a glorified FSY. They taught all those important things and had fun in the process.
How it Went in Hong Kong
I could never do justice to tell how all the things went in Hong Kong. That’s Claire’s story to tell. But I will say, Claire is SO glad for that decision she made! She fell head-over-heels in love with Hong Kong. It was so fun to reminisce with this photo from back when we were there:
To seeing her there with those HXP kids in tow:
She learned so much, from the kids as well as the parent leaders.
She learned that she could survive in a foreign urgent care hospital with a mystery foot problem:
Yikes!!
Got some good antibiotics and was right back at it.
Hong Kong was a brand new HXP destination this year so there were some glitches and shifts and turns here and there.
So glad she had an awesome co-leader for both sessions she led to figure it all out together.
(That’s the second one, I don’t have a photo of the first, darn it!)
How fun do those two look to be your leaders in a foreign land?
It sounds like it was a pretty great adventure for all.
I missed this girl so much!
But it was so fun to get her back last month filled with all kinds of new life experiences from that new beautiful place filled with such good people.
That girl always looks so truly happy, no matter what she’s doing!! I’m sure she was excellent at being a leader for her group. Would you be able to tell us what a HXP leader does? Do they do the kinds of things that she did as a missionary or is this different? Does Claire plan to return to college this fall?
I’m trying to remember what she was interested in as a possible career in her future. Was it photography? Or maybe that was Ellie. Then I thought I remembered her working as an ultrasound tech. but no, that was Grace! So I’m stumped! Your kids have grown into young adults so fast that I can hardly keep them straight! It’s been so interesting reading about all of their activities and accomplishments over the years. You and Dave have so much to be proud of, and the fact that you don’t have to worry, fret, and pace the floor over a rebellious young person is a huge plus! (in my case it’s a grandson I have to pace the floor over.). So I’m glad you get to escape that particular drama! And now Lucy will be off to college!! And that little darling was just a TODDLER when I started reading your blog!! I think I may faint!
Aw thank you Laura for sharing your thoughts and care. Good questions about what an HXP leader does. As a missionary Claire’s purpose was to share Jesus and love with anyone who would listen. She had strict missionary rules, lived with a companion, and her whole purpose was to serve God.
As an HXP counselor she helped two different groups of close to 20 teenagers navigate a foreign country. All the kids turn in their cell phones before they go (I LOVE this part) and get to give some sort of service, depending on where they go. There are groups that go all over the world and each place is different. It’s quite an undertaking! Humanitarian Experience was started by members of our church and aligns with those values, but anyone is invited to attend. They go to church each week and have daily devotionals. The main purpose is to provide service-focused experiences for kids, take them out of their “normal” lives to show them a different part of the world, and give opportunities for spiritual growth as they serve.
You’re right, Elle does photography but is now a graphic designer. Grace is figuring out her path as an ultrasound tech. Claire is still trying to figure out what she’ll do. She did summer semester following her mission and is getting ready for Fall classes to start, we’ll see where that takes her!
XOXO
I’d love to hear about more of the actual struggles of your life. Not just the “ oh we have some big things” I know Lucy has her struggles but looking in for the outside, it seems like the perfect life. No kids divorced or marital issues, all active in your faith, all family love each Other, no one struggling with same sex attraction, or financial worries or rebellious kids etc.
Or maybe they are just happy people living a happy life? Some people really are in a situation or even just a phase where things are good. Why would she write about having a gay kid, or a financial crisis, if those things aren’t happening to her?
And Charity (her sister) has talked at some length on her blog about the spiky and hard bits of being in a big family – and they talk about it on their podcast too. So I don’t see this as toxic positivity at all; more honesty mixed with an appreciation for the good things that they’ve created as a family and a desire to protect the privacy of her family.
I mean this in the kindest way possible, but “same sex attraction” is not something to list along with divorce or something to struggle with. We are in modern times of loving, embracing, and celebrating *everyone.* People can be gay and live wonderful, happy, fulfilling lives. Being gay is okay. It’s also none of our business. All the best
being gay is not a struggle, Sandra
Hi Sandra, (and everyone else), I so appreciate this thread. I appreciate Sandra’s request for the “real” because it’s so natural for us all to want to know we’re not the only ones with struggles. But the other comments on here are also so true. There is a delicate balance to be found. Social media is tricky to navigate. I do want to be real and vulnerable AND there are things I still want/need to keep close. We are happy people living a happy life (as Marguerite said) AND we are always trying to grapple through the depths of so many worries.
It’s in the midst of those worries and struggles that I’m so grateful to believe that we are part of something so much bigger than ourselves. That there is a God in Heaven who is looking out for us all. That we have a Savior who has been through it all before. I truly, from the depths of my heart, believe this.
There is so much I don’t understand in this life of ours. But I do believe God will be with us if we seek to let Him in. I believe He is full of love and mercy and grace. I believe our happiness has more to do with the focus of our lives than our circumstances, as our prophet President Nelson has said. Right now, I am doing this work to “let Him in” with all my might as we move Lucy into her dorm room this afternoon. Praying for angels and miracles as she navigates all the new. There have been and will be so many other things that bring me to the depths of that need to let Him in. I hope I can remember in the darkness that there is light.
Long time reader, first time commenter. Just felt prompted to say that I am a MASSIVE fan of how Shawni navigates sharing both the good and the bad on this blog. She is very transparent that her family struggles (kid worries, marriage spats, financial decisions, health issues), and has been especially open and vulnerable about the heartache and challenge of supporting a kid with disabilities. But I am really glad she has boundaries around how much she shares! Research is very clear about how damaging and dangerous it can be to share too many personal details online, and especially so about others (like your spouse, kids, in-laws). By not oversharing, Shawni is being a good mom/partner–and isn’t that a much higher priority than pleasing everyone on the internet? I personally believe that the internet, at least things like blogs, where we don’t know the writer on a personal level, is best as a place to look for joy and inspiration, rather than deep emotional solidarity–that’s what our “real life” friends are for. I am nothing like Shawni (not Mormon, not married, no kids) but I get great joy out of reading her words because we have similar values of intentionally spending our time and resources to design a life we love. And if you’re not feeling that way after reading someone’s content, it just might not be for you. Lastly, I want to gently push back on the idea of a “perfect” family. Not just that no family is perfect, but none of the things mentioned in the comment above stop a family from being incredibly close and loving. Good parents can build the kind of close relationships that endure differences in faith/values with respect, you can make incredible memories on even the smallest budget, and, as Shawni’s recent post about her sister-in-law shows, families can find incredible healing and new life after marital issues/divorce. I don’t know that I will ever have the privilege of being a parent, but I am grateful for examples (like this blog) that we all should be focusing our time and attention celebrating (and sharing!) the things we love and are proud of about the folks in our lives.
Amen.
Yes!!!!
Oh I love this so much, Megan. Thank you so very much for sharing your words and wisdom. I especially love what you said about the idea of a “perfect” family. There are so many good ways to live a good life, and to figure out differences and help love endure. I will just add to the “amens” with all my love.
XOXOXOXOXO
Yes to all of this! It’s an impossible balance to get exactly right, but Shawnee- and the entire extended family- are very conscientious and careful in what they share. We really don’t have a right to know their personal hardships.
XOXO