As an update for those following along with Lucy’s journey, she is still at college and mustering through all the adjustments. There are hard days and happy days and we’re all learning as much as we bargained for. That girl is as brave as they come. And also quite lonely, as lots of college kids are. How grateful we are for all the angels that still surround her. There are honestly countless instances. But today we’re just going to talk about Labor Day and how Lucy joined the college cousin gang.
You see, my sister and brother-in-law, Julie & Seth, invite the whole crew of college cousins up to their house once a month to feed them. And that is no small feat, because there are so many cousins on Dave’s side in that college area. So many of them are married and many even have kids now. So these guys provide the best gathering spot for them all. These in-laws live about an hour away, but those kids LOVE to gather and they provide the perfect venue.
It just so happened that Labor Day was one of the gathering days. Julie & Seth were hosting a swim/BBQ gathering. Since Dave and I were in town, we were invited to come along, thinking maybe we could help facilitate getting Lucy there.
I told Lucy about the Labor Day gathering and she thanked me for letting her know and said she would make sure she got put on that college kids text group text. I told her I’d come get her if she wanted me to since Dave and I were going. To that she asked why would she let me do that? What did I think college independence meant? Ha!
Oh man, I love that girl and her spit-fire-independence. I love that she so wants to be independent and let her go for it.
So the night before, she called and humbly told me she may need a ride after all. She had looked it up, asked around, and done some research for the bus schedule. She had even asked her roommates to take her to the bus stop (like 1 ½ miles from her dorm). But the timing wasn’t great, and not many seats available. I LOVE that she had looked these things up. She is really doing this thing. And she was so humble in asking for a little help.
I love that Claire, Max & Abby were with us at the time to help us figure out this independence with a little mini family council. Oh we wanted her to be at that cousin gathering. But OH, we wanted to use this as a learning experience.
In the end, because the bus times were full and not very abundant on Labor Day, Claire offered to leave relatively early the next morning to go get Lucy. She wanted to see her dorm anyway and have breakfast with her up there.
Claire’s Visit to USU
Can I tell you how happy these pictures made me?
Lucy had been very hesitant about the cafeteria. She can’t see much in there and it’s dark and she didn’t think there was any food she would like. So it was a little piece of Heaven for Claire to show her they did indeed have some food she liked. Even apple juice for crying out loud!
A sister can get a photo that a mom sometimes cannot. So I’ll post two since they are like precious gems to me.
Salve to my mother-heart.
Learning to Take and Uber
We had decided in our little family council that that morning would be the best time for Lu to learn to take an uber if she takes the bus in the future.
So Claire helped her get the Uber app all set on her phone, helped Lu learn how to call an uber, and had her take it to the bus stop, Claire following behind in the car.
Then the two of them drove down to that cousin gathering together.
The Cousin Labor Day Gathering
I loved seeing those girls arrive so triumphantly to join this crew:
The biggest hug from my Lucy girl easing my mama heart.
And Claire with wide eyes telling me privately how amazing it is that that sister of hers really does know how to maneuver around that campus she had shown her.
It was so good to be with all those Pothier cousins, filling up the whole pool, so many nieces and nephews with babies, including Murph and Ada.
So much love in that back yard filled with grilling hamburgers and talk, talk, talking. Swelling of my heart seeing Lu amidst those college kids: one of them.
Sorrow that she struggles to relate. But oh how she’s trying! It was such a good day seeing her so cradled in love and safety.
Missing some from this photo, but we did our best:
The parents enjoying that break from moving their kids into college:
Labor Day was good to us this year.
Julie and Seth, thanks for hosting us and creating this space for all these cousins!
XOXO
I’m confused. Which schools do Claire and Grace go to? Are they far away from USU?
Does someone expect that Lucy will quit college? You always sound so surprised writing “Lucy is still at college.” Or is that just my inner ear reading it incorrectly?
She is so impressive!
That’s a great question, Grace and Claire (and Max & Abby) are a couple hours away from Lucy. Also good question about why I’d be surprised Lucy is still there. It’s not that I’m surprised per se, maybe a better description is that I’m just more marveling and in awe that she is doing this thing. This thing that is so difficult for her, yet she has so much grit and independence that she’s making it happen. Dave and I have just honestly been paralyzed thinking about how this can work, and we are just so proud over her and honestly in awe as to how she’s maneuvering the whole thing.
This is an amazing story. Can you imagine a world where we all had this kind of back up system?! The thought of your children gathering to brainstorm a growing sort of solution is just beautiful. It made me pause to think about how to be better with my siblings, and how to also surround those who don’t have support like this. Amazing. So proud of Lucy! I just dropped my oldest girl off at school, and I didn’t have any idea till now that the joy of that could also contain so much mourning.
Yes! I love these thoughts. We all have such power to create support systems for those who need them. And in the end, the very building of them helps us as well, don’t you think? I hope your daughter is doing well off at college, and that your mama heart is holding up ok. Sending lots of love your way!
xoxo
As usual, I am eternally envious of the community your family has. What a rare and beautiful gift. I have been reading your blog since I was a teenager and now have two young kids of my own. Although my own family looks much different, I’m in constant awe of the way your family is so sturdy and consistent.
It really is a very rare and beautiful gift to be surrounded by so many good people. I never want to take that for granted. I am forever grateful for those who have gone before who have made the choices that have led to creating this community. I know you and I can do the same for future generations, which is also a pretty beautiful thing. Sending you so much love!
XOXO