There are a few poignant things I remember from my freshman year at Boston University.
I remember my Art History class. Being submerged in the darkness of the auditorium while watching slide after slide of the history of art. I was enthralled. I drank it all in…the medieval times two-dimentionality to the Impressionists to the Realists who pulled my heart into their work. We were assigned to write long papers on individual pieces of art at the Boston Museum of Fine Art. I sat for hours pouring over those paintings, dissecting each brushstroke and expression as the museum became like home to me.
I remember the church building I attended each Sunday where
Clayton Christensen, tall and wise, was my Bishop. Students from Harvard, Tufts, and MIT to name a few all mulled together in a ward where the intellectual conversation was often over my head, but the spirit filled up each room with love.
I remember
Elie Wiesel, the author of “Night” came as a guest speaker to one of my classes one day, and how his gruff voice led us into snippets of inhumanity that was the Holocaust.
I remember reading the BYU “rules” aloud to my roommates and some “extra” boys who happened to be around, their jaws dropping on the floor in confusion that I would want to go to a school so strict and tight-laced after this free-roaming one.
I remember Red Sox games and riding the clickety-clackety “T” to my dorm room close-by. And my roommate who collected all kinds of penguins.
All those velvety memories were spurred on this week as I have been reading over different portions of my parents’ new book,
The Turning. The thing that brought all that Boston University hoopla to mind is that in their book my parents quote
Alexis de Tocqueville. We studied his book “
Democracy in America” in one of my B.U. classes, and we studied it well.
I figured back at the time that that book was unique and obscure: something my teacher just happened to love. But, like most things of any importance, once it plants itself into your frame of reference you hear it mentioned over and over and over again. Over the years my ears have perked up as it’s been referred to time and time again in myriads of different conversations.
That French man was wise.
“If America is ever destroyed, it will be destroyed from within,” he almost prophesies.
My parents take that to heart, and believe that although where we live is an exceptional place, the gradual and escalating break-down of family is the seed that could cause a great deal of destruction.
They also quote the sage warning in Malachi:
Here’s a quote from the book:
“The warning of this book is simple and frightening but by no means new: America’s most basic institution, the family, is breaking down. This breakdown is the direct cause of steep increases in social problems: crime, violence, gangs, teen pregnancy, drugs, poverty”….and pretty much every other “curse” you can name.
My Dad goes so far as to say this:
“This world’s current generations–our generations–parents and grandparents who are now raising children, running companies, creating media, making laws, teaching, writing, voting, consuming–essentially the adults of this current world–may be this worlds’ last chance. If we continue to ignore (or accept temporary solutions for) the symptoms, and if we fail to understand or combat the cause,
the world we have known will not exist for our children. But if we recognize and restore priorities of families and values, we can rescue our own happiness, even as we turn aside the forces that would destroy our childrens’ future.
Dave and I have had quite a few conversations about this book. The first part brings out all kinds of scary statistics and worries about the gradual breakdown of families. A summary with lots of statistics is
HERE.
And then there is a whole “book within a book” with all the boiled-down best practices my parents have come up with over the years to create strong families.
But what I like to think about most, or really, what worries me the most, is the question: what do we, as families who care about the continuation of strong families, do to stay strong and to stand up and protect what we have? How do we help families who need to be fortified? How can we seek harder for solutions? I want so much to help families because I believe whole-heartedly in their divinity.
We need families! I believe that with all my heart (HERE, HERE, and a whole slew of other places I can’t find right now). I know there are so many out there who come from dysfunctional ones. Heart-breaking ones. Troubled ones (hence the worry my parents have that they are gradually becoming more and more that way). I believe we need to stand up for the good ones and not take them for granted. We need to find ways to make them stronger and support the ones who need help.
So I’m excited because I get to give away TEN copies of this new book scheduled to be released in September. I’m excited I get to spread the conversation.
How important is the family to you?
Do you believe, like my parents and I do, that the family can be the unifying force to hold our systems together or is that a bunch of hogwash?
Is our country, as Tocqueville prophesied all those years ago, really being destroyed from within?
If so, what can we do about it?
How can we fight to keep families strong?
I’d love to keep this conversation going. So leave a comment for a chance to win your own copy to start up conversations with those you love. Check out the facts and figures on the new website HERE and come back to leave a comment about what you think for another chance to win.
I will select ten book winners on Friday. Since the book won’t be released until September, my parents will send the winners a portion of the book in email format and then the real-deal as soon as it’s released.
In the meantime, I will go study more Tocqueville and be even more grateful that that dear family of mine encouraged me to spread my wings and go to Boston University all those years ago. Little did any of us know how deeply it would work into my heart.
This is SO interesting! The research I've always read states that the statistics now aren't that much worse than they were 50 years ago, but that we know more about them/advertise them more now. I'd love to read this book! (The Way We Never Were is one book I'm referring to)
The statistic about birthrates being too low, lower than the replacement rate, makes me remember a class I took at BYU called World Populations. We learned some pretty interesting stuff about what was affecting different countries' abilities to keep moving forward, kind of scary to think of some of those things. This book sounds like one that will spark a lot of great conversations, thanks for sharing your thoughts!
This sounds like a really interesting book. I've been thinking a lot about the importance of families lately now that I have a new little family with my husband and baby. I am not of your faith, but admire many things about the LDS religion — the thing I admire most is the importance of families and I will try to incorporate many of your faith's teachings while raising up my own family.
I love the emphasis on the family and the importance of it begin the crux of our society, which I believe it to be. Here in Australia, the break down of family and the rising statistics of families no longer united is devastating to me, and is something I have witnessed first hand. I am 21 years old and my parents have recently divorced after 25 years of marriage. It is a devastating time and one that makes me want to strive and strive for a forever united family when the time is right. It is books like these ones and people like yourself and your intimate and extended family that make great examples of the unity families can share and the love that can be felt when families focus on the journey together not separately. I read your blog and your parent's other novels which such good intention and hope that one say I too will be able to have such a united family. Love it!
Family is very important to me. Your parents' new book sounds interesting. I am grateful for them and others who care about the future of families. Thank you for the opportunity to win their book..
The family is so important. The breakup of the family causes people to be emotionally harmed. I know this from first hand experience, but hope I can give my children something better!
I would loves copy of the book!
Love this. My husband and I married young and we already see people our age getting divorced, going to prison etc. We have 4 kids and it is scary to think how much the world has changes in the 30 years since we were kids- how much worse will it be when our kiddos are grown.
I would love a chance to win!
In the 30 page excerpt I like that your mom, said that together the 11 of you all have the same core conclusions that the breakdown of families is the reason for pain and suffering in the world. It will be interesting to read about how to implement these changes.
Can the infographics be shared?
I'd love to read it. I think about this subject often.
Its simple really, Families are together forever. But it takes work and compromise. We are too willing to give up too quickly…whether in marriage, education, religion, politics…people just have a hard time committing. It's sad really. We need to stand up for what we believe in. Some of us stand up with a loud booming voice while others of us lead by quiet example. Whichever way we chose, we need to hold strong to our convictions of right and wrong, and what will be best for our childrens futures. That is all. 🙂 On a side note…thank you so much for your lovely blog!
Hmmmm. I so agree with everything you said. One point that I think is important to make is to still acknowledge those who do not have such fabulous families (such as yours!). I do believe as the previous comment said that people do have a hard time committing…but it is also essential to realize that we do not walk in others shoes and I can't imagine what it would be like to be in a dysfunctional family. And to say that families are so important (which I know they are) probably seems like a harsh blow to them. I would like more people to treat others like family as well. It seems that people have so many acquaintances and facebook friends but when it all comes down to it we just ALL need to be there for each other…despite differences in families, religions, beliefs, etc.
We are 9 weeks pregnant with our first child, so to say that we have no idea how to parent our newly formed family is quite the understatement. We're hoping that our unflagging love will see us through, but the knowledge and experience of experts is bound to help!
I believe a lot of families are like mine. Just getting through the day, day to day without thought as to how it will effect them in the long run. I want to live my life on purpose. For so long I have just let life happen to me. I want to have and do certain things in my life and I want certain things for my children. And, on the flip side, there are certain things I don't want in my family. I won't reach these goals unless I start paying attention and making informed decisions. Like I said before, I believe many families are the same way I have been. I would love to hear your thoughts on this.
I would love to read this book! Family is so important to me and I am trying to teach our children that. I also love the phrase deliberate parenting you use often!
Very interested in reading this book!
I would love to read this book! Family is very important to my husband and I, and we both talk often about how we want to raise our two small children. My husband isn't all that close with his family, and while I am closer with mine they live many states away and I feel like our connection isn't as strong as it could be. I want our kids to always feel close to us and to know that family is important. So often, my husband and I talk about the distance we feel and while some things we can change, others we can't and we want something better and different for our kids with less dysfunction.
Sounds like it will be a very good book to read!
I'd definitely love a copy. This topic has been weighing heavily on my mind and I've been a very vocal advocate on behalf of families in my community.
Would love a copy. Sounds great!
What a powerful message! My husband and I have not yet been blessed with children; however, this blog has become one of our go-to resources for retrieving sound principles on creating loving, resilient families. I would love a copy of your parents' book as it will equip us with invaluable parenting tools…and I'd love to get an early start on it. 😉 Thank you for this opportunity!
I'm just starting my little family and I know this book would be perfect in helping my husband and I create the family we want. What a great opportunity!
This is awesome and is definitely on my must read list! Thanks for the reminder of Tocqueville….I read portions with my husband years ago and feel inspired to find it again! Can't wait til it is released!
Hello,
( I had to break the comment up int two parts because it was too long, this is part 1)
This is the first time I am commenting, on any blog, really. I came across your blog somehow, even though I am probably not your key demographic. I am a 25 year old student from Germany, currently enrolled in a Masters program for economics.
I would like to address the topic of non traditional families. Your parents cite a lot of very simplified „facts“ and statistics that are not even necessarily bad. I would like to look more closely at two of those:
!„82% of children in Scandinavia are born out of wedlock“. First of all I feel like this is perfectly fine. I do not understand why you think those children are not born into loving, caring and complete families. Because this is what your parents are implying when they use that statistic as an example of „failing“families.
Family is very important to me, that is why for quite some time I did not know how to feel about your parents book. Families are good and strengthening them is good. But the assumption that the families worth strengthening are only traditional families seems very wrong to me. To come back to your Scandinavia example, Scandinavian countries have the ( or at least some of the best) best schooling systems in the world, Scandinavia furthermore consists of the richest countries of the world and they give more than the desired 0.7% of GDP in foreign aid to underdeveloped countries ( The US gave 0.22% in 2005) I could go on and on, but I think it is a well known fact that all of Scandinavia is pretty well off ( I can give you more examples or proof for those claims if you want). I think picking a statistic from Scandinavia was probably the worst example your parents could have chosen. If it is true that families are failing over there because children are born out of wedlock, than they are doing remarkably well despite off it (or maybe because of it?).
I think my point comes down to this: I would like to know how you feel about nontraditional families: gay families, families with long-term partners, single mom families, non religious families. It seems to me your definition of family is very close minded and traditional (one man one woman and children), not that this is bad, but i find the idea concerning that you think a moving backwards in time to more traditional role models and family settings will lead to a greater good. From the very specific statistics your parents chose I gather you feel like nontraditional families are not worth supporting. Please correct me if I’m wrong. Speaking from personal experience I can tell you that growing up with a single mother I always felt very loved, my parents maintained a very amicable relationship, and I got a lot of attention from both of them. I now have a very loving boyfriend with whom I have been together for 4 years. I am telling you this because my family by your definition „failed“ but I still am a very productive member of society and very happy, our whole family is very close knit and happy. Granted „personal experience“ is really meaningless in a statistical sense, lets look at the next statistic your parents used:
This is the second part:
2. The statistic „over 60% of suicides occur in fatherless homes“ is a prime example for a very one sided argument. First of all, whose suicides, children, spouses, extended family? What does „fatherless“ mean ? Maybe your statistic is true, but it implies something that might very well be not true. Your parents are, by using this statistic, trying to imply that kids or wives with no dads/husbands kill themselves more often, because he is missing. What this statistic does not tell you is what „without“father means. Did he die? Because a death in a family is surely always traumatic and may lead to higher rates of depression and /or suicide. But i don’t think your parents and their book the „turning“ have the power to keep fathers from having accidents, being sick, or being killed. And yes a traumatic divorce may also have devastating effects on a child’s or woman’s well being, but as a stated before, I do not believe it has to.
Maybe your statistic does indeed show only those families were the father was not present since birth (I doubt that). Because if that was the case one could argue it shows the true effect of being without a father. But even if that was the case there are probably a lot of other factors that influence whether a suicide is committed. This problem as well as the aforementioned problem about effects that influence the father variable and the suicide variable at the same time is called endogeneity. This is a very serious econometric concern, one your parents seem to ignore in all their statistics.
The overall message of the book seems to be „save families to save the world“ I don’t know whether I would agree with that, even if you included all types of families. I will think about it.
Alright that was very long. I am not trying to offend you, and I haven’t read your parents book, so maybe my assumptions are not true. But just from the website link you provided the book does seem rather, sorry to say this, ignorant.
I want to close by saying that I enjoy your blog a lot, I like the pictures of your kids and your family and I do believe you are nice people. The website of your parents’ book simply rubbed me the wrong way. I hope my English was alright 🙂
Sasha
I would sure love to read this booK!
I would sure love to read this booK!
I need help with my family. I would love a chance to read this book.
I come from a broken, dysfunctional home and have spent hours and hours studying everything I can get my hands on to make sure the cycle ends with me. I'd love this book as another aid!
Families are so very important. The state of families nowadays is very troubling. I would love to read this book.
This very topic is on my mind constantly. I would love to have their book to reread over and over.
I read Teaching Your Children Values when my oldest was still a baby. Many years and 3 more children later I have read and re-read many of your parent's books and found their advice to be spot on. I would love a chance to read their newest book. I agree wholeheartedly that the family is the core of our society and am so disillusioned at the way our society and government has been chipping away and marginalizing marriage and families over the last few decades.
I love those quotes. It sounds like an amazing book.
Since I've just started my own little family, I would really love to read this book!
Your blog is very inspiring, Shawni. Thanks fkr all the great ideas you share with us!
I would love a copy!
This would be a very interesting book to read! I grew up in a great family, but I know those around me didn't and I could literally SEE how it affected so many parts of their lives. So sad.
I keep writing things down, but the words can’t really express my thoughts on the family, but I will post some of them anyway. There is a reason so long ago that the Family Proclamation to the World was published. When it came out I remember thinking, “Oh that’s nice and true.” Over the years since then I have had defining moments when I have experienced the prophetic power of it and exclaimed to myself, “The prophets and apostles truly were preparing us to combat the ills of the world that would arise today.” I am so thankful that my family is financially blessed enough to stay home with my children. I understand that they are my legacy and I want them to be able to give so much to the world. Having stay at home moms are not the only ways a family can perform well. My mom worked and was a wonderful mother, but we still were a family who played together and supported one another and worked together. We were united and there was purpose in how they taught us. My family is the greatest blessing in my life and I would love to do anything I can to help all people be able to say that.
This interests me as I have seen the degradation of society. We all have seen it, but my question is how do I protect my family?
I would love a copy of the book. Healthy families are crucial to the success of our society. I think some are in denial that the violence, promiscuity etc of our society is caused by the breakdown of the family. I heard your Dad give some of these statistics and his concern for society at the POM Park City retreat this May. It is obvious they are very concerned and are a light on the hill to so many.
This sounds like a great book. I would love a copy.
I would LOVE to get my hands on this book.
The current statistics are staggering. I usually joke with my friends who claim to not want kids that I am keeping up the population for them (I'm 26 and #4 is due in January), but I guess it's much more real than I make it out to be. People are choosing a life removed from family and they choose it freely. I can't imagine what I would do without my family (even the hard stuff) and I love the resources that you and your family provide to help mothers and families be more deliberate and strong. Many heartfelt thanks to you and your parents.
Sounds great. I'd love a copy.
The statistics about people how many children are below the poverty level saddens me, because I know how difficult it must be for the parents who are really trying to be intentional parents but have so many other concerns like paying for rent, food, safety, etc. I think about a little boy in my son's kindergarten class who at class parties sneaks food into his backpack for later and has never had anyone show up for any parent party or school activity and longing looks at all the other kids and their parents. I don't know what his family situation is like. Maybe his parents are absent, maybe they don't care or maybe they are trying so hard that sadly they just have to miss these things, but I see it affect him nonetheless. What has caused the tipping point in the degradation of families? Morality? Economics? etc?
I would LOVE a copy of this. I love all of your parents books.
I'm not a parent yet, but watching teenagers get into trouble and make bad decisions scares me to death. I hope I can raise good, happy and healthy kids. I would love a copy of this book!
P.S. I love the part about joining a Team. Even if I don't win, I'm interested in joining A Team.
My husband and I are just starting the next generation of our family (our first child is due in December) and are busy filling up on wisdom about how to establish a strong family from Day 1. Neither of us come from models we want to emulate, so turning the tide, setting new standards for our family and establishing our own model of what "family" is for us is critical. We've seen the benefits of your parents' wisdom via your blog and those of your sisters and would absolutely love to share in that wisdom and "pay it forward" to our children and the greater world. Thanks Shawni!
Family is incredibly important – our fIrst priority! I'd love to know how your parents did it!
I would love to have a copy of this book in my home.
This topic has weighed heavily on my own mind while I have 3 small children and trying to figure out the best ways to raise them in a world where family isn't deemed important any more. I would love to read this!
Among all the scary statistics, what I am most interested to learn is how I can make a difference in my own little family. Although my footprint may not affect a whole society, I know I can have influence in my home. I'd love to know your parents' thoughts in rearing a righteous and responsible children.
I love this post. I wholeheartedly agree with this topic. Families are so important. I have a cousin who went to prison for a while because of drugs. My 7 year old daughter overheard me talking about him to my husband. She asked "You had a cousin that went to prison?" She was shocked. I told her yes and that it was because he did drugs. Her reply was amazing she said "Didn't he have a mom that taught him not to?" Kids know. They want boundaries and someone that teaches them. It was so poignant to me. We need families and their strength and for people to care about their kids and raise them well. I love your blog and all that you share. We need more families like yours! I actually just saw your dad on a boat at bear lake last week. My in laws have a cabin by you guys. We love it up there too:) and practically spent all of July there. Thank you for this post!
I love reading your parents books, and have quoted them to our children while having "the talk". I truly believe the family and breakdown of it will be the downfall of our country unless something is done about it, and love reading books and blogs that serve as wonderful examples of strong families. As a mom of 6 little ones, I am constantly searching for ways to grow a strong and united family. I would love to win this book.
So uncanny that this just popped up as I learnt this afternoon of a friend's sister who was mugged in daylight in a well to do shopping street here in Perth. I was disgusted and was having a conversation saying we need to bring back "Old fashioned parenting" and discipline and respect needs to be taught. The " family" as such is disappearing and all these problems are being blamed on teachers, police, boredom etc etc and anyone else they can think of, instead of looking in their own backyard. I wish our society would realise that we are not helping by giving away so much money without having to work or earn it and being too lenient on those who do wrong . They will never learn respect for others if they don't learn to respect themselves first.
So timely! This very subject is something my Husband and I have been talking about a lot lately. I think so highly of your parents, I would love the opportunity to win this book!
In today's world, every person is focused solely on themselves. Because marriage requires a lot of sacrifice and forgiveness, and because more and more people are increasingly selfish, the two do not go hand in hand; therefore, marriages suffer and the family takes a direct hit. This in turn affects our community and the nation overall. The domino effect is very destructive.
family is everything and i am so thankful that your parents share that message. thanks for your example of putting family first. i am working hard to build a strong family, and man alive… its no cakewalk! in other words… i could use a good read like this!
just went to the website and felt inspired. what else matters more than family? it truly is the crux of all existence.
one time at church i heard a girl teach a lesson on life. she stated that we were alone before we came to earth, then we came to earth alone and then we leave earth alone.
i was devastated at this false doctrine. we lived in a family before earth life and we come to earth in a family and then we leave and head back to our heavenly family.
families are eternal.
Love your blog and would be so grateful for a copy of this book! Thanks for doing so much good in our world!
I just had my first baby a couple of weeks ago! Oh my the amazing feeling and roller coaster of emotions has been a little overwhelming! Already my husband and I are talking about all the things we want to teach this little girl. We took a huge leap ofFaith and decided to have me quit my job and be a stay at home mom. Family is everything to me! I love reading about ways to make our family better! Your family is incredible!
Families are the backbone of society and if they fail, society fails. I would love to read that book!
I love this, and would be honored to be one of the first to read the book. I agree that the breakdown of the family is one the biggest problems in our society. LOVE your blog, and the peeks into your own beautiful family.
Would love a copy of this book!
I would love to win this book!
I am a mother of 8 who learned almost all I know from reading and rereading the books your parents wrote. Although I am from a dysfunctional family myself, I firmly believe that learning to create function is possible. It has been my life quest. It is not enough to appreciate good families– we must teach each other how to transform and create these homes. It is tough to do, but there is no greater work. Thank you (and your parents) for sharing what you know. This book sounds bold and spot on– I can't wait to read it!
I read the preview of the book and am dying to read the whole thing now. I especially loved the chart that showed examples of the erosion of family functions — so fascinating (and scary).
I love your parents books! I have a handful of them and this is one that I would like to add. I'm always reading and learning and trying to strengthen my family.
Being recently divorced, here's my opinion. According to many our family is now broken. But really.. it has never been better. We are still a family. It just looks a bit different than what it did and what I had hoped and dreamed for.
We can all help by being supportive and loving. At the beginning, all I wanted was some family to invite us over for Sunday dinner. Or to include us in an activity they were doing.
But we are still very much a family and can be happy and strong.
Oh man, as a momma-to-be this is a little scary for me, but also encourages me to do what I can within my own home. Sometimes I feel like I have to go out and influence a million people to affect positive change, but then I remember counsel that the work I do in my own home to build good, kind, rooted people is more important than any other work. And I feel like I can do that. I'd love to share this book with my husband as we prepare for our first little one, to help with our conversations about the family "ambiance" we desire and how to achieve it.
I'd love a copy!
Love your parents books and would love a copy!
I'm all for strong families but why do they need to remain the same? "If we continue to ignore (or accept temporary solutions for) the symptoms, and if we fail to understand or combat the cause, the world we have known will not exist for our children." Does the world need to stay the same as"we have known" or can its evolution be a good thing?
Society is growing to recognize and honor families that include people of mixed race, same sex parents, and folks with non-conforming gender identity. I think that's a great thing for families even if it means what families look like it changing.
I think in our effort to be more tolerant of others and less judgemental we seem to have become more accepting of the ways of the world. God has told us we are to love one another, but we shouldn't have to accept their behavior. Sometimes it seems to be a fine line we have to walk. I have this in my own family. How do we stand up for what we believe and know to be true and right without seeming critical & judgmental? I keep searching and praying for answers. I truly see our society crumbling around us as people seemingly accept more and more things that only a few years ago people felt ashamed of doing. It makes me fearful for the future of my children and especially of my grandchildren. The family is fundamental and important. I love your blog and books. It is a great example of what we all should be striving for in our families.
Fascinating. I would love to read this book! My family is the best part of my life.
Would LOVE to read this book!
I would LOVE to read this book. This sort of topic has been on my mind lately when you see things in the news and see things happening around you. Even if I don't win a copy I'm buying it. Can't wait to read it!!!!
I would love a copy to read and share! 🙂
I'm sure the pages would be worn, dog-eared, and highlighted if I had a copy of this book. I adore your parents and love learning from their wisdom.
Family is so important! I would love to have this book!!
I would love to win this book!
I think we need to keep our families strong by discussing the importance of strong families and keeping that at the forefront of public discourse, rather than letting it slip away or be regarded as old-fashioned.
I would love to read this book especially now that I have teenagers. The other influences are pulling them away from family.
I liked from your parent's website the part where they said that it is easy to hear about all the turmoil going on in the world– but we are looking at the cause of it.
Love that!
I'd love to win…but can't wait to purchase one 🙂
Absolutely loved this: "There is no cause that will be more effective in meeting the needs and solving the problems of today’s world than the strengthening of families. Every social problem that affects our country—from crime to drugs to porn to poverty—is most effectively and efficiently impacted not by business or government programs or philanthropy but by stronger families. The biggest problems the world has are best solved at the smallest level—in the home."
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I haven't even been married a full year yet (11.5 months, same thing right?), but I feel this same worry as we prepare to have our first baby in November. I already see such a stark difference between my marriage and the marriages I see from people around the world: they are falling apart and not even trying to stop it! It makes me so sad. I have asked myself that question so many times and am sure that will continue as we have more kids – what can little old me, and what can my little family, do to make a difference? I have no idea, is the honest answer, but the only thing I know how to do is be obedient! The prophets and other inspired men have warned for so long about this problem, and they were right on the head! So if I follow their counsel and pray with all my heart for guidance and help, I think that's enough, at least for now. This is such an interesting topic. The family is ordained of God and is the backbone of society! We need strong families more than we need strong marketing tools or technology or sports team fans or anything else. Without strong families, we really will destroy ourselves from within. I would love to read this book, your parents are incredible as are you!
I have been thinking a lot about this very subject lately. It has been on my mind and in my heart because so many things outside are tearing at the heart of families and it is so hard! I am preparing to teach my young women a lesson this coming Sunday about why the family is important. One of the talks I read reminded me of what you wrote about and what it sounds like your parents are advocating in their book, it is a talk by Sister Beck, entitled "Teaching the Doctrine of the Family." It is an excellent talk! It really made me think about what can I do to better teach my children just how important families are and what we can do to strengthen and fortify our family better against the oppositions we face. Here is a link to the article: https://www.lds.org/liahona/2011/03/teaching-the-doctrine-of-the-family?lang=eng
Thanks for your blog, I have found so much to be inspired by and to think about and try to do with my own family! I wish I could be more like you! Thanks!
I am a long time member of values parenting, a mother of 5 graduated "joy Schoolers" and have always loved and admired the Eyres! I want to join and help spread "the cause!" Sign me up! 🙂
I am currently pregnant with twins and think about this subject often. I would love a copy of the book to hear your parents' perspectives!
What a timely book. My husband and I are starting to feel more and more alone in prioritizing our family first. I'd love to read this book and take in the awesome thoughts, ideas and conclusions your parents have wisely put down on paper for all of us to read.
I come from a big family with my mother being the center of it – she would always arrange family reunions, host big Christmas parties etc. She died of cancer in 2001 and it seems like our family los its inner core – no more reunions etc. I have my own family now and since I am reading your blog regularly, I want to rebuild what my mom did so many years ago. I'd love to read the book!!!
I've never commented before, but I am so interested in this topic. As the above poster said, what a timely book.
Your parents inspire me so much. I was led to their books and blog through you and Power of Moms, but there was definitely a higher power at work putting their inspiration in my life at just the RIGHT time.
The website for The Turning is amazing! The statistics blew me away. So very sad. Especially the one about suicide rates in fatherless homes. We just dealt with that in our family. I've found myself in so many conversations where people complain about the larger issues your parents talk about (policy setting agencies and the media), but so often forget that their own homes are the best place to start.
It says right away to start in our family cultures…not just in raising our children, but our marriages and relationships. Create cultures that are stronger than the negative influences in the world. How true is that!?! And yet, people look for the bigger stuff before the things right in front of their face.
I would love a copy of this book. We are just starting to meet as a mom's group at our church. I'd love to read it and then share it with them as a book study. Thank you for the opportunity to receive it in this giveaway!
Wow, what a timely discussion. We all have a role to play in bringing this issue to the forefront of our culture.
This book will be a great read! I would love to share these ideas with friends and family and use some pof the best practices to strengthen my family.
I would love a copy of this book. I've been discussing this very subject with my parents this summer. Thanks!
This book would be very interesting to our family!
This reminds me of many things I studied and loved in college! We're about to have our first child soon. I would love a copy of this book! Thanks for the giveaway and your awesome blog!
Those statistics are so interesting. I would love a copy! Thanks!
What a great looking book! I've quite enjoyed delving into your parents' books. How blessed you are to have family members to delve into the importance of family and motherhood with in conversation!
Oh, and that stat about the rate of fatherless homes…I had no idea it was nearing 50%!!
Would love to read this book. Sounds so interesting and informative!
I think this will be an amazing book. I agree that the destruction of the family is causing many of the issues we see around us today. As a mother of 4 boys, a wife of an Air Force pilot, and an educator of young children, I worry about how we can help ALL children get through life. We work so hard with our own families, and need to keep doing that, but how do we help those around us who may not be that lucky. I hope your parents can give us some concrete ideas on how to support your own children, and those who might need a little extra help.
I married young (19) and it was the best longest lasting decision of my life (along with making sure I marry worthily in the temple and always live worthy of the temple blessings). I see some of the people I knew in highschool (and family) making different choices and it makes me sad for them because I know how much happier they could be.
I love the issues discussed in this book and can't wait to read it! I think it's important to do as your parents and as you have done – to be courageous enough to talk about these issues. Not in an angry, argumentative way but with love and with passion. Because that's the only way we can make a change. To love people enough to share these truths with them! And to use our families as strong case studies. Can't wait to read it!
The key to a strong family, and a strong society, is being deliberate. I'd love a copy of this book!
Love this – so excited for this book to be released. Families are forever and nothing can replace a strong family. I treasure my family and hope I am able to instill that same feeling in my children.
Thank you!
First, let me say that I highly value families, and absolutely see the importance of family. I myself am lucky to have an amazing one, for both celebrating and supporting each other.
However, I took a look at your parents' website, and have some comments as to the statistics.
1. "Over 50% of countries have birthrates below the replacement rate." OK, so, over 50% of countries have less than 2 children per woman. The fact checks out. But, does that necessarily undermine the family? Does that undermine a country? There is a growing problem with food supply, and the environment won't be able to support us much longer if we keep our population rate going as it is. Not to speak of energy-crises with the ever-increasing pressure usage cars, electronics, planes and factories. I think there's a lot to be said for loving, small families instead of chaotic families where children don't get the attention they deserve (unfortunately, not everyone is as energetic and amazing as your family is!). More time for each other = better learning curves = more opportunities and smarter children = the problem solvers of tomorrow. A country doesn't need to have an ever growing population rate to 'survive', I'd even suggest otherwise (less children in poverty, for example, and more money per child to be distributed to go to college, better funds for less schools, more subsidies for health care per person, etc).
Anyway, my point: having a large family doesn't necessarily make a family better, and doesn't necessarily mean survival for a country.
2. "82% of firstborn children in Scandinavia are born outside of marriage." Quoted from this (http://usatoday30.usatoday.com/news/world/2004-12-15-marriage_x.htm) article. The article, however, does not reveal the source of this statistic. Moreover, it states that in the COUNTY (without R) where a certain Pettersen lives, 82% are not married; this does not apply to the whole country. I've looked a little further, and found several (non-scientific) articles: 1) http://dalrock.wordpress.com/2013/08/15/is-europe-proof-that-intact-families-dont-really-matter/ and 2) https://www.york.ac.uk/inst/spru/research/nordic/denmdemo.PDF
As you can see, approximately 45-55% of children are born outside of marriage in Scandinavian countries – far less than the 82% stated. Not only that, but only 4% of these children born outside marriage have lone mothers (and more that 70% of parents still live together at adolescent age). So 1) the 82% statistic is false, and 2) the 'born outside marriage' does not necessarily represent a broken family.
I know that for your religion, marriage is very important and sacred. However, I think for the importance of a family in the sense of 'helping'/'saving' a country, or just, you know, for having a good family in 'this life', marriage is not necessarily important. I think it's more important that there are two loving parents (in the broadest sense of the word, for me personally), who can give their children the love and attention they deserve, and help them to the best of their abilities in achieving what they dream of. Scandinavian countries rank among the happiest and most secure countries in the world (http://www.cnbc.com/id/101022436#.). They are the top in the world regarding education (http://www.businessinsider.com/finlands-education-system-best-in-world-2012-11?op=1). Happy, well-educated people rule the world, don't you agree? And being married apparently does not mean that you can't be that.
Again, I totally agree with your statement that family is important and amazing and the best thing in the world. I just had some issues with the so-called 'statistics' on your parents' website. Nonetheless, I do agree that a tight family bond can prevent a lot of heart ache and crime, and can strengthen the economy and a sense of 'belonging'.
I'd be interested in – critically 😉 – reading your parents' book!
You and your entire family are such an inspiration! I would love to read and learn from your parents! Thank you!
I have two young sons and another on the way, and I know this book would be help my husband and I create the family we want. Even though we have a few years under our belts as parents we still feel like we have no idea how to create the strong family unit we both hope to have.
I do think that family, or the worth of family, has a lot to do with our society and how we treat each other. I am the youngest of nine kids, and my family is very tight-knit. Outsiders, friends and other loved ones, often take issue with how codependent my siblings and our with each other and our mother (sadly, our father passed away a few months ago). Yes, sometimes having everyone so involved in each other's lives can get aggravating, it seems like any decision has to get 10 peoples' approval sometimes. But, I wouldn't trade the relationships that I have with my family for the world. It always breaks my heart when I see families that aren't close. To me, family starts with a healthy, happy marriage. Marriage in America has been crumbling for a while, and I think it's only getting worse. I don't think people get married with the big picture in mind. I view marriage as the building blocks for a family. Living in the south, many of my friends and old classmates have married and many are now divorce. Some got married just out of high school and weren't really ready for that commitment. I actually had a friend who got married to her boyfriend because they had both pledged abstinence until marriage, and they were tired of "waiting" (her exact words when she announced her engagement). They were divorced within a year because she said she didn't know him well enough to move away with him when he was stationed at a base across the country. Yet, she knew him well enough to marry him? (I am not dismissing abstinence pledges, I also do not believe in staying abstinent until marriage. Obviously they just missed the point of the whole thing.) Several of my friends had big, expensive weddings and then were divorced quickly afterwards. I think people are tempted by the idea of a wedding, and they never really think about the marriage part. Even if they don't get a divorce, how can they be committed to building a family together if they're not committed in their hearts to each other? I see so many families who barely speak to each other, everyone exists in their own bubbles, they can all be under the same roof and no one is speaking to each other, they're not taking time to be a family together or do things together, they don't even eat meals together. A family should be united, and schedules get busy but there should be an effort made so that at least a few times a week you do things together, and you eat meals together as often as possible. Not only is a family building relationships with people you can lean on for the rest of your lives, but it's also teaching you how to coexist with people, period. I meet so many of my peers with very self-centered worldviews, and then I find out that their family wasn't very close and I immediately understand why they became selfish. Everyone in their family was taught that "only out for myself" mentality because that's how it was in their household. Obviously when you have an entire society of people who our only out for their own good, that's when everything starts falling apart.
to Merle/Sasha – your english is impeccable and I appreciate your viewpoint.
I don't know if the book supports this, but I feel our focus should be on supporting every family as it currently exists, "broken", gay, single parent, etc. Supporting families should mean fighting abuse, neglect and poverty wherever it exists, and helping end cycles of dysfunction. We should not care what form the family takes as much as whether it is accomplishing its highest purpose: to be a haven where each family member feels safe, loved, and supported.
I don't know much about your family, aside from what they share on blogs, but it seems your parents know a thing or two about raising successful, strong, loving, determined children. I would love the chance to read their words about such an important matter!
I don't think my last attempt to comment worked so if it did, please forgive me.
I'd love to read a copy of this book. I have read several others of your parent’s and have appreciated the principles they've taught. I know I’m trying my best to be a deliberate parent and to set good practices into play in our family. I would be interested in also knowing what we can do to help others build strong families.
Also, just putting this out there. I'm acquainted with a few intimate examples of those coming from a dysfunctional family to lead a very strong one. It’s not easy, but it is possible. If you’re in that situation, don’t give up hope and know that you can break the cycle.
This books sounds like it will provide an interesting perspective based on experience!
this gay family used the Eyre's books on values parenting, and so does mine. it's very disappointing that the eyre's themselves don't see gay families as equal to their own.
http://www.lambdalegal.org/sites/default/files/publications/downloads/impact_201206_what-makes-a-family.pdf
Growing up my family wasn't especially close. But now that I am a mom of two little girls there is nothing I want more than to create a strong, tight knit family. I'd love to read the best practices we can put into play.
Looks fascinating! I'd love to read it.
I'd love to win this give-away, thank you!!
I like winning things.
The family.. I love it so! I can't wait to read this book and share it with others!
Would love to win!!
Would love to win!!
Sounds amazing! I would love a copy, thanks!!
Family is extremely important to our society and the countries in which we live Unfortunately I see people around me that place higher value in other things and think I'm strange to insist that we eat together each night, home together on Sunday's and regularly spend time together.
16,000,000 children are living below the poverty rate. That number is staggering! I'm interested to read their book and see what their ideas are.
This is so interesting! I've been thinking so much about the failing of families and sometimes feel so frustrated because I don't know what to do to change it. Sounds like this book has some great ideas for me!
family is so important! My husband works at a youth jail and it really brings home how much a good family can help your children!
Can't wait to read! Would love a sneak peek!
Would love a chance to win this book! Not a mom yet but I know I will need all the help I can get.
A Nation is only as strong as its Families!
I'm a brand new mom. Barely into our 5th month. My boy is my world and I cant wait to read this book. Even if I'm not picked, I'll definitely be picking it up and making a conscious effort to read it (i havent read any books other than my scriptures since my little man was born)!
I appreciate you and your parents and your wise words and advice. Thank you!
I would love a copy of this book!
I was so excited to hear about this book when I met your parents in Park City. I think it would be a lovely gift for my dad (who loves to read and think about things) and I'm wondering if it is, in fact, an enjoyable read for those whose families are already grown?
I can't wait to get my hands on this book. 🙂
Family has always been important to my husband and I. We aren't perfect parents but we've always put family and home as a priority and will continue to do so. Marriage and family is hard work and not glamorous..but it is so important.
What a timely and important book. I can't wait to read it.
I would love to win! Thanks for the giveaway!
I am definitely interested in reading more, especially from your parents' point of view. I am not of your faith, but respect it very much and would love to hear your parents' perspective on this important issue!
I'd love to win this book, too! I've loved your parents' other books and I really admire their efforts to strengthen families.
I just finished your book, and would love to read this one as well! Your example and expertise has inspired me to be a better Mom and strengthen my family more effectively. It is so important with the scary times we live in! Family is fundamental, and is the basis that everything stems from. We must stand up for it!
that privilege would have this book
I would love to get a copy of this book because I agree that the breaking apart of the family is the foundation of the trouble we are seeing in this country. I'm thankful there are people out there like your parents who devote their time and talents to raise awareness about this problem and to give people help for their families! Thanks!
I believe that family is important…but individual moral character is as if not as important….we cannot blame the decay on one thing…it begins with ones moral character and belief system…in Gods eyes we are responsible for our actions….and our actions are what bring forth goodness, love and responsibility in our relationships….
This is a subject I think about and my husband and I talk about all the time! I can't wait to read the book!
I would LOVE to get a copy of this book and share it with my family and extended family who are also very big fans of your parents books!!
I ABSOLUTELY believe that the decline & destruction of families is contributing to America self-destructing. I also believe that the masses are being dumbed down, and that generally speaking people are lazier. It's easier not to put in the time & work, let someone else "take care of everything" & pretend thst eveything is just fine. It's not.
I'm looking forward to reading this book, whether I win a copy or buy one in September. xo
Having experienced the traditional family- being tossed into the role of single mother- and now as part of a blended family I agree that the family NEEDS to be protected.
Children need UNITED parents. When I was married to my children's father, our children were able to be taught with greater power because we were united. When they were disciplined and got upset, they had to learn to deal with the consequences of their actions.
As a single mother, and even in a blended family- the children get upset that something doesn't go their way and the first thing they say is, "I want to go live with (the other parent)." They look for the out because now they have one. I can't tell you how often this happens. It breaks my heart.
Families are meant to be united. Together. Forever. The fall of families is definitely a contributing factor in the fall of society. Definitely.
I love the example you and your family are. You admit it isn't always easy- but it is worth it!!!
-Lisa in Seattle
I read an article in LIFE magazine 10 years ago it too described the destruction of the family as well as high drug addiction and the basic break down of society and quoted HORRIBE statistics. At THE END OF THE ARTICLE it asked the read "WHAT YEAR ARE WE TALKING ABOUT?" The year was: 1900!!! The fact is people have often stated the "Break down of society" and the "loss of families" as somehow the end of the world as we know it for THOUSANDS of years! I have 2 dear friends who lost their husbands at age 40 and 36 and left them with small children. According to your statistics the fact their husbands dropped dead is contributing to the break down of society! Blanked statements like this are completely unfounded. This is how your statistics read. Creating fear, worry, and panic are all emotions that are not based in reality. With the age of information we happen to KNOW MORE than we EVER did before. Living in fear and illusion that our world is coming to an end because people are raise in a variety of family situation is irrational and unfounded. Fear and worry is never a basis for a healthy out look in life. It is an illusion that will destroy your joy and shatter your hopes and dreams. Your family has seen up close what poverty and lack of education causes. Let's promote LOVE and not FEAR.
The dissolving of the family is something that we discuss regularly. It's frightening and heartbreaking at the same time. I'd love to have a copy if this book by your parents-who have devoted their lives to families.
I also believe wholeheartedly that the family must remain strong and is the basic unit of society. I would love a copy of your parents book to learn more of ways I can strengthen my own family. Thank you!!
My heart breaks. My husband and I were discussing this very topic this afternoon. Can't wait to hear what your parents say on the he topic.
I am so interested in this! I am planning on majoring in family studies when I begin college.
The statistic about 82% of Scandinavian children being born out of wedlock is so sad! The family is so essential to society and how it functions. I'd love to read what your parents have to say about it.
Family is very important to me. My parents will be celebrating 42 years of marriage next week. This is both of theirs 2nd marriage. I have a half brother from my dads 1st marriage. This coming weekend we are having a family get together at my parents house. My husband is finally going to get to meet a lot of my family. I am so excited about it.
In the past year I have seen so many families break apart. My husband and I are from broken families. What parents don't realize is that the damage that they inflict on their children is life long.Would love to give this to my husband.
I have loved all of your parents books, and I can't wait to read this one.
This has been a topic of conversation in our house. Would love to read this 🙂
my husband and I married our first year out of college….26 year later..while it has had its ups and downs…we wouldn't change anything. we have 4 children who are well on their way to being wonderful adults and we know FULLY how important FAMILY (and all that encompasses) is to their individual successes. I can't wait to read this book!
It's so comforting to see that there are other people concerned about the integrity of families! I was just talking with my friends about this and how the term "family" has new meanings. I trully deeply believe that families are the nest of our society and therefore we must tresure it with all our hearts! I need this book! =D
Sounds like an interesting read.
wow i am so excited for this book to come out! i can think of so many people (including myself of course) that would LOVE to read it. I'd be thrilled to win it too!
one thing i loved about the site was all the stats and info–especially when comparing generations. But what I love even more, is the Eyres don't leave it at that. there is a movement to join, a change to be made! can't wait to learn more in the book.
I would love to read this book! It's sad that these days people do not think that families are important.
Oh how I adore your parents books. Even if I don't win, I'll need to end up with this book in my hands!
Family is a topic I study constantly. I come from a stable, loving family while my husband comes from a divorce situation that has spiraled downward to the point now that most of the siblings don't even speak. I have watched over the past 15 years as my in-laws have literally unraveled and have seen terrifying results. As a mother of 6 kids I will do anything to ensure that that doesn't happen in our family. I would love to read the insights your parents have.
The family is everything. My mother-in-law passed away yesterday at the age of 80. 3 hours before she passed away, I watched the miracle of an estranged daughter coming to visit her mother, literally on her death bed. Today, I've watched miracles as the siblings reached out to this estrange sister, and she tenderly, broken, reached back. It is evident to me that my mother-in-law who suffered longer with a terminal illness than she needed to, hung on, praying for the return of her long lost daughter. Family IS everything. Now as our children are having babies, I find that they will need much more guidance than we had as we were raising our children. I search high and low for good material for them. I'd love to read your parent's book. Thanks for sharing your blog with us.
I along with many others have been concerned about the break down of the family and family values for a long time. I think the timing of this book is impeccable.
How powerful! I want to join a Turning Team as soon as I'm able to talk to my husband about it. Awesome! I cannot wait to read this book!
I am so excited to hear about this book!! I can't wait to read it and share it with my married children.
I truly am inspired every time I read something from this beautiful family of yours. All of you have this unique quality to reach others and to help others for the greater good. I am so lucky to have found your blog which has helped me significantly to become a more deliberate person in all aspects of my life. Thank you Eyre family:)
I truly am inspired every time I read something from this beautiful family of yours. All of you have this unique quality to reach others and to help others for the greater good. I am so lucky to have found your blog which has helped me significantly to become a more deliberate person in all aspects of my life. Thank you Eyre family:)
Family is super important to me and i have learned so much from your blog on how to make us better and stronger!
I would love a copy of their book!
Oh man I hope this reaches the New York Times Bestseller list and so far beyond!! It is so so important that we make changes at the fundamental level because it is something we all have at least a little control over and can actually affect change.
Ahh going through your parents' new website gives me so much hope that even though it is a terrible situation there are still things we can do!! I can not wait to read their book and learn more about what to do in my own family and how to teach those around me and my children!
Sorry if I'm posting twice, I'm having troubles
"What can you do to promote world peace? Go home and love your family." -Mother Teresa
Family is the most important thing to me. I have love getting ideas and inspiration from your family.
I would love to read this book.. Fingers crossed for a chance to win a copy!!
This book seems absolutely fantastic! It really is so sad how the importance of family is being tossed aside. My husband and I often talk about how we can keep our family strong and often feel discouraged as we sometimes make mistakes in raising our children(nothing like parent guilt to get you to make changes:) I'm excited for some new perspective and to see what your parents have to say. Also, I feel like your blog really does so much for the family. So your doing great!:) I get so inspired every time I read it:)
It's always such a great reminder to keep on keeping on and to have family remain first. I would love to read their new book because I'm always looking for new, better, and inspiring ways to be a better parent. Thanks for sharing!
So interesting. Would love to read! Also, would love to know why you chose BU for your freshmen year? Did you have non-LDS roommates then? When did you later to go to BYU and why? Would love to hear your experience!
I would love to read this book with my husband. We both come from divorced families and waited years before having children of our own to make sure we would work together first, not wanting to put our children through a divorce. I'm lucky enough to have a good relationship with my siblings but I want my children to have more meaning a good relationship with each other, us as their parents and their future spouses. I would appreciate any advice!
I just read your parent's book, The Happy Family, and it was one of my favorite books I've read on family. My husband and I have implemented so many new things into our family life because of it. But it also caused me to look at our world a little differently and see how many things compete for our children's loyalty. It's true that our country doesn't value family the way it use to and it's heartbreaking. I'm looking forward to reading their new book.
I would love to read your parents new book! I have many of their other books and love their insight and so appreciate their suggestions on things I can do in my family to make it stronger. Family is most important to me and most of my goals revolve around how I can be a better mom and have a stronger family.
I think about family all of the time. I am a teacher and see the effects on children who are in families that are struggling to stay together or are getting divorced.
Sorry I couldn't keep writing for some reason. Anyways I pray for my family every day that we continue to love one another and be the best we can be. I would really love to read a copy of your parents book to help us with this 🙂
This sounds amazing! My husband is a seminary teacher, and we are continually talking about these "hot" topics & how we can teach our children to be righteous examples. I would love a copy of this book!
You are an inspiration. As a joy school mom of the '80s I found my copy of Teaching Children Joy in my Joy School box for my daughter to read last year. Now as the grandma, I am rereading and collecting Eyre's books to read again.
Such a worthy cause. I am sincerely excited about reading this book. As a former educator, school principal and now adoptive/foster mother…I have seen firsthand how the deterioration of the family unit is negatively impacting children, families, schools and this country as a whole. The basic tenets of the traditional family unit have changed dramatically in a seemingly short amount of time and with that, we have seen an almost insurmountable increase in gun violence, bullying, domestic abuse, teen suicide, immorality, pornography, divorces, depression, anxiety and so forth. Just what little I was able to surmise from the 30-page pdf excerpt on the turning.com website—this book will no doubt raise and encourage very worthy (and much needed) discussions/debates about the need for stronger families and re-establishing stable and loving homes for both adults and children alike.
I'd love to read this book 🙂 protecting our family is very important to me and any help is much appreciated!! 🙂
I would love to read this book. Your parents have such amazing advice and I love how strong your family is…such an example. I feel scared that the family is crumbling in these times and I want to keep mine strong and be an example to others on the importance of families. Thanks for your continual example on what is important in this life!
I would love a copy of the book. I also went to BU and attended church in the same building that you did 🙂
I'd love a copy of this book to read and share!
It is never too late to start a strong family even if you did not come from one. It is a choice–our choice–our society, friends, etc., can help you, but it starts with you. Thanks for your strong commitment.
I am excited to read about how to further strengthen my family but more importantly, how to teach my 6 children how to strengthen their families when they have their own. It is only going to get harder and they have to have the tools when they become independent to make it work too. Thanks for the good example.
I'd love a copy! We currently live in Detroit and the breakdown of the family is very apparent here.
One thing I've noticed that people seem to be attacking about this book is the idea that fatherless homes are less than ideal. I don't think saying that kids need to have a father at home in any way diminishes the role of a good mother. Fathers are enormously important and to imply that they can be omitted from a family without any real consequences is to lend even more evidence to the argument that society is severely troubled.
Shawni: I read your blog everday, and follow your parents on social media as well! I too am worried about the breakdown of the family and thus of society. It is so sad to see this happening right before my own eyes. I grew up in a traditional, very strict, but loving Chrisitan home, where a heavy emphasis was placed on maintianing high morals and values, and always looking out for those who were less fortunate. Somewhere along the way our society lost it's moral compass, and our traditional values. We have witnessed the breakdown of the family, the reshaping of the family in which "anything goes," which has spilled over into the "political correctness" war that we are now seeing. Being a Christian of any denomination is equivilent to baring a scarlet letter, and speaking of any God in this country has become almost taboo. I don't know how we as a society got to this point, other than by the degradation of the family. It is very sad to witness, yet I (as should all of us) push forward proclaiming the morals, values, blessings, and promises of the family. We are enduring hard times, but I am reminded of the Pioneer trek to the Salt Lake Valley…WE MUST KEEP GOING!
My husband often talks of his experiences in Philadelphia. He talks of boys and young men who grow up without fathers and then they themselves are non-existent in the lives of their children because that is all they've ever known. It is a tragedy, but all it takes is for one generation to change for the better! I'm signing up for team A on your parents' website.
I never saw this principle as much until we moved from Utah to Maryland and seeing so many people wanting to leave home so badly. It breaks my heart to see families imploding. You can actually see the prophecy of "men's hearts will fail them" all around us. But now I realize that it goes for all of us, mom's hearts, kid's hearts, etc.. I can't wait to read this book!
I read the first little bit from a link from your parent's website and I am intrigued to read more. I know families are important and I love how well they put that into words.
I hadn't seen the website until now, but they are doing great things to gather the facts and make people think, hopefully to ACT as well!
I hadn't seen the website until now, but they are doing great things to gather the facts and make people think, hopefully to ACT as well!
I would LOVE to have a copy of this book! If I don't win, I will definitely be purchasing it. I am the mother of a 2 year old (in sept.), and we have our 2nd little one on the way, due in Feb. The mother's part of my heart seems to be in a constant ache. Always worrying about my daughter's health, development, am I being a good mother, etc! But mostly my heart aches with worry about the world she's been placed in. I want so desperately for her to have many of the same experiences I've had in my life and every day I feel like I'm watching that slip from our grasp more and more. Society as a whole is failing in so many ways, and while I can't protect her from every bad thing in this world, I do have a responsibility to raise her properly and teach her the values she needs to shape her own future family. Your parent's couldn't have said it better than when they defined the family as the crux of everything really. The family really is the most essential part of society and if families continue to decline, we are in big trouble. I believe that with all my heart. I have a feeling this book could change the world if everyone would read it and really soak it in. You have amazing parents Shawni, and you and Dave are amazing parents, and while I've never met you, I'm so grateful I came across your book, "A Mother's Book of Secrets", and your blog when my little girl was only weeks old. Your example has done so much for me, more than you'll ever understand. I really, really mean that! I hope I get to meet you one day 🙂
Would love this book!! Love what advocates your parents are for families and parenting!
Sounds like a fascinating and very worthy read. I would love to read and promote this book. Thanks very much for the chance.
I've done a lot of research on this because I feel I'm supposed to be a voice on this topic with my family. I come from a long line of intellectuals who I'm sure thinks I'm crazy for "wasting my potential" as a stay at home mom. 🙂 But I know that raising my own family is my chance to change the world, and I love this job!
This book sounds great! I do worry about our society especially as I see how those around me parent and how their families function!
I would love to win a copy!
I also believe that raising our children to have good morals and character is the most important job we, as parents have. Also important is the idea of intentional mothering, a spiritual and
time/schedule balance is needed for a successful family. I am trying to learn that would love to rad some guidance from your parents!
My testimony of families has grown so much in the last few years. I'm primary president right now and I pray constantly that the children will gain the testimony that family is the most important institution on the earth.
A new copy of their latest book would be much appreciated. I would love to read it and pass it along to others. Raising 6 kids in South Carolina. the_heims @ yahoo.com
My husband and I are very interested in this topic, and would love to read more about it. Thanks for hosting the giveaway!
I have heard this topic creep up more and more lately. I'm so glad there are proactive people out there, to educate and spread the word (I feel like I can only focus on my very own family). What wisdom has been researched and compiled. I'd LOVE to read the book!
I absolutely believe that families are the fabric of our society! I am a huge fan of the books I have read by your parents, so I'd love to read this too!
I wish I had known about your parent's books while I was raising my family! My daughter and her husband have just celebrated their one year anniversary and I would love for them to have this book Before they start their family!!!
I've really enjoyed reading all the comments here…very interesting! Can't wait to read the book!
Holly
Would love a chance to win the book. I think I've read all of your parents' books and appreciate their wisdom and perspective. Thank you for championing this cause!
It is so sad to see some broken families who can't give a good perspective to their children. I think families are very very important, but the same way that people are entitled to make ther own choices in their lives, they're also responsible for and acknowledgeable to their families/relatives. I'm not from your church, not any other, but I will soon (probably) be having a family of my own and I agree with you in the importance of families for creating good citizens; but on the other hand, I also think that those who didn't have the chance to know what having a good family is also have the right to be good citizens and create families of their own. I don't know, it's so complicated.
Just what I have been looking for, as I have been studying you to help me learn how to grow strong family.
Family is so important! I would love to read this book!
I would love to read this book.
I find now with our family that we have a house full of teenagers. Family life is different. We are being pulled in all kinds of directions with many distractions coming at us and out kids. We need to be grounded in one solid goal. We need our kids to love, play and interact more with other than on a device.
This book sounds awesome for FAMILIES!!
I would love a copy of this book to read (and most likely re-read again and again).
I'm studying family life at BYU right now and would love a copy of this book!
I love a copy of the book. Can't wait to read it.
Would love to read this book! My husband and I have two small boys (with hopes of adopting to grow our crew one day). My goal is to learn with them, serve with them, and most importantly pray for them and their walk with the Lord.
The Anne Frank quote on the Turning site….one of my favorites (and a kick in the rear for me too). I have it on a bracelet!
I would love to win a copy!
Our baby girl is almost 10 months old and though I find myself worrying about what her future will hold in a world full of changing values and disrespect for the importance of family, I have hope! I'd love to read this book and gain more insight into what we can do as a family to strengthen ourselves and the world around us.
I have always loved the Tocqueville quote,,"America is great because she is good, and if America ever ceases to be good, she will cease to be great." I worry about the state of our nation, the sate of our families around the world, and the environment our children find themselves navigating through. Thank you taking a stand for families.
As a young mother I get so overwhelmed thinking of the world my children will grow up in. I would love the help of your parents' book in learning how to focus on strengthening my family!
I am so sad to see "gay marriages" listed as an erosion of the family in the sample portion of the book. I know numerous married gay couples who have children and those parents instill the same love, wholesome values, hard work and dedication that you instill in your own family– yet they are an "enemy" to "the family"? I think the Mormon and Christian communities are missing out on some tremendous allies in fighting for the good in this world by dismissing an entire group of people as "gender confused" enemies.
I am still very interested to read the book, as I really do admire your family's commitment to creating and sustaining really solid family units. But I have to admit, with this huge generalization made at the very beginning, I worry about the content that must follow.
And my last thought is this… even if one believes that homosexuality is wrong, is "fighting" it on some broad, political stage REALLY going to "fix" it? Banning gay marriage does not make gayness go away. So why spend our energy there? Spend it on hunger, healthcare, any number of other issues or causes that need energy and attention.
My parents divorced when I was a young girl. All sets of my grandparents are divorced. All of my aunts and uncles except one couple are divorced. One of my 2 brothers is divorced. I'm ready to break this chain! I can use all the help I can get from successful parents like yours. I would love a copy of the book. 🙂
Just starting our family (due with baby 2 in September) and I would love to have this book! Family is everything & we need to do everything we can to protect families and strengthen them! Which is a pretty daunting task now a days…
Sounds like a great book and I completely agree with the main idea.
This sounds so interesting. It is easy to become fearful raising children in our society that doesn't support strong families. I think there is such power in being deliberate and proactive in strengthening our families. This books sounds like it would be a great aid in doing that.
I just finished an online BYU course on Strengthening Families so this has been on my mind a ton over the past few months. I would LOVE to see what your parents have to say on this subject. They are amazing people.
Love all of your parents books. Would love to get a copy of this one too!
What a great site. I love statistics. I think often about the post you shared from Humans of New York. It's sad that people could be so willing and/or eager to sign off their families. There is such importance and purpose for families!
Pick me Pick me!!
As a mother of 5 kids, 2 of which are adopted out of foster care I think everyday what their life would be like if they stayed with their birth parents. Breaks my heart how they came into this world. Family is so important. Thank you
What matters most…families! They truly are the strength to any society, which mean they are also the weakness once the scales are tipped in the wrong direction. Guidance, comfort, love, support, companionship, 1st friendships, loyalty, respect, achievement- oriented, determination, FUN…and these and so much more are found in the core values of a family. I couldn't imagine my life without mine! Would love a book 🙂
I have been a missionary for the ARP (Addiction Recovery Program) for the past two years and I have seen the breakdown of the family and how the effects that society plays a rule in pulling families apart. I would love to read the book. I love the work your parents have done and continue to do to strengthen families. I have seen the effects that our society has had on my own family. I am constantly searching for ways to unite my family and to keep a good relationship with my siblings and their families who live in another state. Thank you for sharing this information.
I am Becky Jones by name. Greetings to every one that is reading this testimony. I have been rejected by my husband after three(3) years of marriage just because another woman had a spell on him and he left me and the kid to suffer. one day when i was reading through the web, i saw a post on how this spell caster on this address kuvukitemple@gmail.com have help a woman to get back her husband and i gave him a reply to his address and he told me that a woman had a spell on my husband and he told me that he will help me and after 3 days that i will have my husband back. i believed him and today i am glad to let you all know that this spell caster have the power to bring lovers back. because i am now happy with my husband. Thanks for Dr.KUVUKI. His email: kuvukitemple@gmail.com
I would love a copy of this book. I've been feeling the need to be more deliberate n my family, and I'm sure this book would help me and give me the motivation.
FANTASTIC! Could not agree more!!! Would love to win, read this amazing book and spread the word 🙂
I got all emotional reading this post (in my defense, I just spent 3 weeks on hospital bedrest and then 3 weeks with my baby in the NICU so emotions are close to the surface). . Families are so important! I love all of your parents books and would love this one!
I just went to the website. I'm hoping to win and save some money, but if I don't I'll definitely be buying the book and joining a team! I love that I'll be able to read it online first because I don't want to wait.
All of the statistics are sad, but the one that I'm thinking about most are the ones about children without fathers around. My husband's step-grandma is about to have a new grand baby. Her granddaughter is 17 and not going to marry the father. I asked if her granddaughter had considered placing the baby up for adoption (acknowledging that it'd be extremely hard) and she said she wouldn't let her even if she wanted to. Made me really sad for everyone involved. While placing a baby for adoption might not be the answer for everyone, I believe it is something that should definitely be considered when the mother is so young and the father isn't in the picture.
I would LOVE to have this book to learn from, as a soon-to-be newly wed, my fiance and I have determined family to be our top priority. Your example and the lessons from your parents that you have so graciously shared have been such an inspiration to me already. Thank you!
Those statistics are alarming. 50% of countries have birthrates below replacement rates?! Perhaps one of the reasons is a giant, cultural shift in priorities, at least in westernized countries. I know couples who have decided "to have dogs" instead of children. They have decided to give their time and energy to their careers and like the "Freedom" they have to travel and do other "Fun" things they "couldn't" otherwise do with children. Although I am not a mother yet, my heart wants nothing more than to experience the spectrum of experiences and emotions that are part of motherhood.
Family is everything to me and I do agree that the family structure is the most important unit. Since it's the most important then why don't we put every effort into nurturing and supporting and loving it? I am a young mom and just beginning my journey but I have been wanting to start reading parenting/family books to help me along the way. I would love a copy of this new book 🙂
Family is so important to me. It's the most important unit and so why wouldn't we put our best effort and thoughts and energy into nurturing the relationships that mean the most? My family has brought me so much happiness in my life and now as a new, young mother I want these same feelings for my children. I want to start reading parenting/family books to help me along my way so I would love a copy of this new book.
The quote I liked the best on your parents' website is "The only rock I know that stays steady, the only institution I know that works, is THE FAMILY."-Lee Iacocca
I agree with this quote as long as love and work are put into the family. A family cannot stay steady and work unless the work is put in. It's a growing unit and needs to be nurtured, cared for, and watered with small, daily drops of love. The family that works together and has the same end goals will remain steady throughout time.
I would like a copy of their book. Sounds like an interesting book to read.
I would love to read this book!
I would love to win!
I am shocked by many of the statistics shared. Reading this post and looking through your parent's website for this new book, gives me the strong desire to DO something! Family is so important! Thank you for sharing this. I cannot wait to read this book and find suggestions on how I can make even a small impact.
This sounds like a really interesting book. I would love to get my hands on it!
Families are essential to Heavenly Father's plan. Satan also has a plan and his plan involves the destruction of families. I agree that it is important to build families up and create something strong enough to fight against Satan's plan. This sounds like a wonderful book.
What an important book for our day. And I love that your parents are starting a movement on their website- the powerof one! 🙂
I love how in tune they are in the world and all the issues going on.
Despite coming from a wonderful family, I still worry and fear for my own family as I raise them in this ever changing world. I want our family to a strong, safe haven where we can all stand together. Would love to read this book!