Back when I got to announce we have a little “Peanut” on the way, (Max and Abby’s baby we can hardly wait to meet), I promised I’d come back to talk a little more about Lucy’s reaction to this big news.
Because as you may or may not know, Lucy is not a fan of babies.
I think they are just not predictable enough for her. She gets super grumpy if ever we are around any babies. Especially at church. It’s a real concern.
So Max and Abby were a little (actually a lot) apprehensive about telling her. All of us were.
When Dave, Lu and I headed up for the UVU/BYU volleyball game, we went to Max and Abby’s apartment after the game so they could let her know in person.
As soon as she grasped the news, she gave just the reaction we figured she would: she slunk down in the couch and got really somber and quiet. It was kind of a sad night, all of us pretty unsure how this was all going to go.
But I am happy to report that that is not the end of the story.
It’s been kind of fun and SO SWEET to watch Lucy come to grips with the whole idea, gradually.
And strangely, the thing that helped her start to come around was Bardet-Biedl (BBS her syndrome).
Max and Abby let us know they were getting tested to see if they were carriers for BBS. (A whole new dimension to this pregnancy, something Dave had hoped to have all the kids do before anyone got pregnant, but didn’t get to Max and Abby in time.). BBS is a genetic syndrome and both parents have to be carriers to pass this gene on to their children. Dave and I had no idea we were both carriers, nor that we had a 25% chance we’d pass on that unknown gene each time we had a baby.
At the news that Max and Abby were getting genetic testing, Lucy suddenly perked up and started asking all kinds of questions.
It was a process, but eventually they got the results: Abby is not a carrier, and Max is. Which is good news for the baby and their future babies, but lets us know that all their kids will have the potential to be carriers.
Lucy took all this in so earnestly and even drew up a Punnett square from what she studied in Biology last year, and sent it on our group family text with squares and circles showing who we know is affected so far.
Who knew a Punnet square could be so incredibly endearing?
A few days after we found out Peanut is a girl, Lucy texted me this: “do you think it’s ok if I start telling people about her?” (her texts are often quite cryptic, but I knew she was talking about the baby). I told her to ask Abby, and Abby said she sent her the sweetest text asking for permission to tell “a couple close friends” about it.
Such a big deal that she cared enough to want to tell friends, and it melts this mama heart of mine.
It’s an interesting process for sure, and who knows how it will all play out.
I mean, she’s definitely not snuggling up trying to feel the baby kicking at this point, but it’s been pretty beautiful to have a front row seat to watch the baby steps of acceptance lighting the way.