Oh my goodness I’m slow posting this week. I’m really celebrating this good Dad I’m married to since we’re coming up on our thirtieth wedding anniversary. Yow. But I do want to pop in and say some stuff about the importance of dads. And share some ideas to celebrate them.
Because I do believe they make the world go around. I wrote this in my email newsletter this week, but there are so many studies that show the incredible benefits of a good dad. And with Father’s Day coming up, I just wanted to take a minute to praise them:
Those dads all over the world who are stepping up, showing up and doing their best.
Having an active father figure helps kids emotionally, cognitively and even academically. What’s so cool about that is that being an involved dad helps the dads too, not just their kids.
Encouraging the Dads in our Lives
Sometimes we all need a little encouragement to know that what we’re doing matters, am I right?
Dads are no different.
So I love Father’s Day as a chance to let dads know we notice even the little things.
One year leading up to Father’s Day I did a little experiment. For a week I took time to intentionally notice everything Dave did as a dad. I noticed things like what a difference it made when he had a smile on his face when he got home from work. How he took time to help one of our kids put on their shoes patiently. The little things he did to support and encourage me as the mom. I took time to write those things down each night before I went to bed, then gave him my list on Father’s Day.
It did two really important things:
- Helped me notice all the things I had been taking for granted.
- Helped him feel buoyed up that the things he was doing mattered.
I realized, once again, that feeling “seen” matters.
And being the “seer” of the good things matters too.
Other Father’s Day Thngs:
- Gift Ideas for Men — I’m a lover of sentimental gifts (like that list of all the good things Dave did that year), but sometimes you just need a little physical gift too, right? Here are some ideas. And it’s from my kids who always have good ideas.
- Our Favorite Games — Here’s a list of our favorite games, and I think Dads are all for games that bring the family together. I don’t think that list is updated to include our two most recent favorites which are Qwixx and Wizard.
- An Ode to Three of my Favorite Dads
- Some Video Clips of my Favorite Dads
I envy you and all women who have had great Dads and great husbands. My Dad taught me some great skills and serving others, but he was abusive. I learned to not trust others.
I figured getting married, I had found THE GUY. Nope. I married someone like my dad. And I stayed because of being a member of the church. Our sons never called on Father’s Day yesterday. He never showed up for them unless it was all about himself. How do you celebrate that?! It was a hard Father’s Day for me because I was reminded of the hurt and the pain.
Oh I’m so sorry, M, for all the pain you have gone through. That must make Father’s Day pretty painful and I want to hold space for you. The world can seem so unfair at times. I do believe that there is a bigger picture that is sometimes so difficult to see when we are “in the middle.” I hope there can be light ahead for you, perhaps with your sons. I hope that they can somehow change that cycle of fatherhood and make it better for their own children some day. For now I am just sending you lots of love.
XOXO