Already just at the beginning of junior year, Lucy and I have come to the realization this year might be a rough one. Her vision has deteriorated enough that we’re not quite sure how to maneuver classes like anatomy.
I mean, how in the world can you memorize all those body systems, draw diagrams of them, and recognize them on a chart when you can’t see?
Oh that girl has the best helpers/teachers ever who will help her through, that’s for sure. But the heaviness of this new reality has been really weighing on Lu for the last little while. This is a difficult burden to carry.
So the other night, as she was wading through hours of homework, she asked if we could do the “fingertip thing.” And my heart just melted.
Because the “fingertip thing” comes from her childhood.
And mine too.
My dad would scoop us kids up every now and again and write the first initial of the “talents” he saw in us on our fingertips with a ballpoint pen.
It’s amazing the power that one little thing would have on us.
Sometimes when others recognize and celebrate the things they think you do well, it helps you to cherish/build/recognize them more as well.
And Lucy remembered.
And I was so glad. Because of course this wading in some sorrowful worry would be a good time for a little pick-me-up.
So, the two of us sat by her bed, surrounded by her magnifier and papers and worksheets and the jumble of school things that had been taking her hours and hours after school each day, and wrote down the first initial of my most favorite things about her.
I was so glad for a chance to stop time and let her know that really, I “see” her.
I see how hard she’s trying. I see her kindness. I see her work. As her mother, I see her heart.
And with each letter I wrote, I felt her frustration and worry melt, just a little, as she sunk closer and closer into my side.
At the same time as I felt my love for surround us both and hold us close.
I hope that somehow, someway, through that little act of writing letters on fingers, that she might feel a piece of how much God loves her too.
Because this girl of mine is the real-deal.
I just hope that she can hold all those things I see about her close. Tiny seeds to help her recognize more and more of her own, as she does the work of growing into the woman she has such grand potential to be.