Home Elle plan 397

plan 397

by Shawni

…that’s what plan it feels like we’re on with getting these two married.

I appreciate all the well wishes from readers here as well as from so many family and friends checking on us, sending love and concern for “what now?”

The piles of beautiful invitations Elle lugged home from Hawaii to send out are currently gathering dust in a corner, but although plans keep changing, at some point we’ll figure out the best way to send them out!

The first plan, of course, was to get married in the Laie Temple on April 21st.

Just look at that beautiful spot! It is right by the BYU-Hawaii campus and Elle and Carson feel like that’s “their” temple so we were planning a big party there.

And by the time COVID-19 reared it’s ugly head we were just starting to get a handle on it all. Finally. (It’s not easy to plan a wedding in all that tropical wonder from the desert), but things were finally starting to fall into place, venue booked, flights purchased, all that jazz. Elle was coming home for her bridal shower and wedding dress fitting in the middle of March, and we were all so excited.

But as we all know, the world has changed dramatically since then. When our first plans fell through, and the world started closing in, we figured out a new plan. And that has happened over and over again.

First to go was the Hawaii deal. They basically closed down the island (we were lucky to get Carson here before they locked down a bunch). All temples had limited availability, and within a few days they just closed down the Hawaii temple all together.

So Elle and Carson thought maybe they’d wait to get sealed when they could have everyone there (they were so excited to have everyone in that sacred place).

But then the plan morphed to just getting sealed in the temple with a tiny group, trying to chose which siblings to invite, and THAT is no easy feat I’ll tell you that!

Elle was all set to go to the temple for the first time in preparation for her wedding last Friday, but within two hours of making that appointment Grace literally gasped when she looked at her phone and found this:

Which, of course, called for another new plan.

I have to admit I am so proud of the way these guys are rolling with the punches. We sat down that night and talked through all kinds of options, those two still with big smiles across their faces. They are in love, and it will all work out.

This is an adventure, I’ll sure give it that!

It’s a pretty beautiful thing that there still are options though. So grateful that they can get married civilly and get sealed in the temple when the world finds it’s axis again. It is so strange to have the temple unavailable. A place where they both have planned to get married for their whole lives. Such beautiful sealing covenants they will be waiting for. But we are looking at the bright side, because this will sure be a grand story that is unfolding. We plan to have a big party in Hawaii when the temple is open again and they can plan their sealing.

But for now, they’ve gone from deciding to just wait for their original wedding date for their civil wedding to moving it way up, to going back again, and it changes day to day as more things get closed down and we get more and more worried about the state of the world and we all want to figure out the right answer that will keep everyone safe yet still let these two get married!

It’s not just the wedding date, but it’s what to do after thats that makes it tricky. A traditional honeymoon of course, isn’t an option, and since a few days after Carson arrived this came out in the news:

…it is up in the air when they can really get back to Hawaii even when they do get married. Not sure if their housing will still be available even if the self-quarantine order is still in place.

Carson brought a little carry-on not really knowing all that would be changing, so it’s crazy but they are rolling with it all pretty beautifully I must say. Here they are with a shower gift someone still dropped off at the back door after we cancelled the bridal shower:

…still glowing and happy. I love them.

How often do you get your future son-in-law to live with you for a few weeks before he marries your daughter? I have to say it’s pretty awesome to have him around. He’s the first one to jump up and help and is so easy-going with a house full of girls and it’s fun to see how solid and in love these two are. We have been in good touch with his family, wishing they could be here too!

The other night the four of us went on a little “date” to watch the sunset one night and sat outside talking until late all about life and marriage, soaking up the fact that we get them here right now:

And this is a little silly, but I thought it was pretty a good reminder forever about what happened the month in 2020 when they were supposed to be bursting out of that temple in Hawaii as a married couple:

We are in uncertain times for sure. Darkness looming all around. Which makes it pretty grand to have the light shining from these two.

Some day soon they will figure out all these details and it will be a beautiful union. Love them forever.

If you want to keep in touch, you are welcome to keep up with plans through their wedding website HERE. Thanks for the love that blog readers have always sent on over for Elle.

XOXO

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23 comments

Kristine April 6, 2020 - 11:02 am

Another change for the future. Allow people to go through the temple at 18. Even if not immediately going on a mission or marrying.

I understand their wanting to seal in Hawaii but why have 80 people get on an airplane to go all the way there? I can see 15 people going. It’s expensive. It uses up a lot of fuel. It takes a whole day for normal people to travel there, I’m talking door to door. Most get to the airport after driving an hour, get there in plenty of time to get through security a few hours before the flight, after landing have to rent a car and find their way to hotel and then go through check in process. It is 8-12 hours depending on where they are coming from.

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L.A. April 6, 2020 - 12:52 pm

I get why they want Hawaii. It’s where they met. It’s where they fell in love. It’s where he proposed. They have most of their memories together there in Hawaii….
It is a special place for them. It’s a beautiful place for their most beautiful ordinance of eternal marriage….It’s their dream. And I understand how all that just fills their hearts. I believe in letting people choose their dreams. This is theirs. I hope it works out for them. L.

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Kristine April 6, 2020 - 1:24 pm

I get why they would seal in Hawaii. Only select people can go in to see the sealing. I get 15 people going, including younger sisters not allowed in. I don’t get 80+ going. There is getting married, sealing and a wedding reception. All are very different things. Obviously not even his parent’s live there. I don’t understand “destination weddings” either among the millennial generation. Particularly since they want to excessively tax the use of my car that gets me to work/school every day, get groceries, etc.. wanting over a hundred people to fly on a plane thousands of miles back and forth for their wedding and reception that will last a few hours.. It is not logical or pragmatic. I really hope this couple gets married as soon as possible, can seal once their Temple opens and celebrates. Even if it’s over a series of days.

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Shannon April 6, 2020 - 5:10 pm

The good news, Kristine, is that you don’t have to understand any of it or worry yourself with the details of someone else’s wedding. You’ve made it clear this would not be your choice. Got it. Just wish them well.

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Nancy April 6, 2020 - 12:36 pm

They’ll definitely have a great story for their children and grandchildren!

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Kimmjo87 April 7, 2020 - 9:54 am

Thank you to you and Elle, sharing her story with us. It has to be hard because you know so many people think they are entitled to the information when you yourselves are not even sure whats going to happen. Whatever happens, whenever it happens, it will be perfect.

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Jen April 6, 2020 - 2:44 pm

What a fabulous couple with a great story!! I hope they get their Hawaii dream party when everything settles! And I KNOW so many loved ones would eagerly sign up for a Hawaiian vacation in celebration of your sweet daughter and son in law. It doesn’t take much for me to want to go to Hawaii and a sealing/reception would be the perfect excuse! Good Luck to all of you!

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Kim April 6, 2020 - 3:30 pm

What a wild ride we’re are all on! We just had our son’s wedding too. He and his fiance were planning June 2020 but resolved that a civil marriage would be best until temples open again. Best wishes to you all.

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Alex April 7, 2020 - 4:50 am

You’ve made it clear this would not be your choice. Got it. Just wish them well.

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Katherine April 7, 2020 - 5:14 am

I too had our wedding get postponed because of coronavirus. We had planned a large Jewish ceremony on a tiny island in the Bahamas where my in-laws have a house. It took 8 months of planning, tons of flight organizations for all of our family and friends, I had the dress, we had the food, band, and everything. I was meeting with my girlfriends, who are all spread out around the world and some I haven’t seen in a year, in the Bahamas before the wedding for my mini bachelorette. Two weeks before, the borders closed down and we had to postpone indefinitely (everything is already paid for). It was devastating, but my husband and I still decided to get married on our original wedding date. We had a civil ceremony at our house in Toronto with just our immediate family who could be there. We decided to save our vows for our traditional Jewish ceremony when we can share them in front of all of our family and friends, but it was a beautiful and intimate civil ceremony at home in the midst of all the chaos going on outside. A little quote from our ceremony that I thought perfectly summed it up: “This current time is a situation none of us could have been coming, but we’re here today to celebrate that life goes on in the midst of challenging times. Even more so, now is a time to celebrate whenever you can. And what better reason to celebrate than uniting two people who love each other”. Currently, we’re honeymooning with my in-laws instead of in Tanzania, but we’re learning to laugh through it all.. Best wish to Elle and Lar while they figure this out! Whatever their decision, it will be theirs and it will be perfect.

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Stephanie April 7, 2020 - 11:02 am

I love this! Thank you for sharing and congratulations and best wishes to you and your new spouse!

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Sabrina April 7, 2020 - 6:49 am

Elle and Lar are clearly meant to be – handling an incredibly upsetting (and stressful!) situation with grace and patience. When they get married, it’ll be the best, happiest party I’m sure! In the grand scheme of things, this is just a small blip in what will eventually be their eternal married life together :-).

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Cindy April 7, 2020 - 9:30 am

These two are darling. Hearty congratulations! For all your family. She seems to glow in her pictures.
Let us all plant flowers to one another’s doors…. not weeds. Love one another.

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Andrea April 7, 2020 - 9:35 am

They look so happy.. I know everything will be fine and they will have an amazing wedding!!! Praying for you all xxx

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Lisa April 7, 2020 - 2:14 pm

They are such a lovely couple, so obviously happy and in love. Best wishes for the days and years ahead. Make memories together. Life is good. And have fun! Thank you for sharing your joy with us.

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Melissa W April 8, 2020 - 6:24 am

My heart goes out to Elle and everyone else having to change their dreams into new plans during this interesting adventure. Monday I watched a couple from my ward (via Facebook live) get married. Our bishop (standing the appropriate six feet away) said the most beautiful thing to them that made a huge impression on me. Paraphrasing: Today you’ll join an special group of people that got married while waiting for a temple: the pioneers that crossed the plains; early saints that waited for sealings while temples were being built; saints during wartime. It’s hard when a temple sealing was the plan, but it’ll come. Today is a joyous day.

Their smiles, excitement and love where still so fun to see. (And how can we not help but be thankful for awesome technology so we can watch when only 10 people could be there!) What an story to start their marriage with too! I wish you all the best in planning and celebrating.

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Melissa W April 8, 2020 - 6:27 am

My heart goes out to Elle and everyone else having to change their dreams into new plans during this interesting adventure. Monday I watched a couple from my ward (via Facebook live) get married. Our bishop (standing the appropriate six feet away) said the most beautiful thing to them that made a huge impression on me. Paraphrasing: Today you’ll join an special group of people that got married while waiting for a temple: the pioneers that crossed the plains; early saints that waited for sealings while temples were being built; saints during wartime. It’s hard when a temple sealing was the plan, but it’ll come. Today is a joyous day.

Their smiles, excitement and love where still so fun to see. (And how can we not help but be thankful for awesome technology so we can watch when only a few people could be there!) What an story to start their marriage with too! I wish you all the best in planning and celebrating.

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Tracy April 8, 2020 - 7:24 am

Love their positive attitudes about all the changes. Can’t wait to see what they’ve come up with for getting married during this time. I’m sure it’ll be lovely. They’re a darling couple!

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Janan W April 8, 2020 - 1:14 pm

Wow, what a ride! ha! It is so hard to have plans seemingly, constantly thwarted, especially when you’re talking about a once in a lifetime event like a wedding:) Everyone getting married this year will have the best stories, though, seriously! haha:) I’m sure whatever finally happens will be beautiful and it’s own kind of magical, talk about once in a lifetime!! ha! Happy planning!

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pest control April 9, 2020 - 4:01 am

They’ll definitely have a great story for their children and grandchildren!

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May April 11, 2020 - 1:57 pm

I don’t know very much about LDS weddings – is a couple considered married in the eyes of the church (ordinarily, I mean – obviously just at the moment things are probably different) after a civil ceremony, or only once they have been sealed? Do couples ever not have a sealing, or only have a sealing? I have some friends who had a civil ceremony and then a religious ceremony a few days or weeks later, and considered the latter to be their real wedding, but legally they’d be married from the former date. My own wedding was religious and legal simultaneously so I’m interested in how it works in other faith groups.

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Jenn July 19, 2020 - 5:32 pm

Those are great questions! Civil marriages are recognized by the The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. The difference is that getting sealed in the temple is getting married and forming a family for eternity, not just until death. Getting sealed in the temple also is getting married (religious and legal simultaneously, like your wedding). I hope that helps!

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Mom April 14, 2020 - 8:44 pm

Love the faith in their eyes that somehow this is all going to work out1

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